Bad Gun Handling

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Just going to share a quick story that may just impart a little added caution to those who wish to give a gun to a relative with good intentions.

My mother has never been much of a gun friendly person but over the years I've heard her describe situations where she thought she might have felt more comfortable had she owned a gun.

For a while she was meeting people pretty regular on craigslist/facebook to buy different odds and ends, furniture, toys for the grandkids, etc... So to cut the story a lil short, me thinking she ought to feel safe and have some means of defense when she's meeting strangers, going on walks, hikes etc... I gave her a revolver. I told her not to carry it until we got a chance to shoot it together and could take the proper time to show her safe gun handling and so on.

Anyway, we go to my makeshift range and I show and tell her all the safe handling stuff, and I forget exactly what prompted me to put my hand up so as to signal for her to stop for a second while she is halfway through a six round cylinder. She sees me throw up the time out signal and she, obviously thinking I was referencing some problem with gun, tips it straight back, hammer cocked, finger on the hair trigger and looking straight down the barrel.

I felt like all the blood had been sucked out of my body and I was very scared in that moment. As soon as I could take control of the situation and make the gun safe I kind of snipped at her. She knew it was unbelievably dumb but at the same time I felt at fault. I dont know exactly what I could have done to prevent it as we went over the safety talk beforehand, what I think it all boils down to was just a stupid life threatening mistake from someone inexperienced with guns and my inattentiveness to some degree or another.

I was so nervous from that incident that I didnt let her keep the gun. I got a sense that maybe my mother just shouldn't have a gun. I want her to be safe, but I also dont want her or someone else to be less safe because of the gun and I dont know if some people are ready to put the thought or time required to safely carry. I think some people dont understand that you dont just buy a gun, stick it somewhere and when the need arises you'll just magically know what to do with it. Some may disagree with me, but something about that incident was like a wake up call for me. My hands start sweating whenever I think about it. I think she might believe I over reacted and am making more of it than I should but I just dont want to be responsible for what could happen from being nonchalant with a firearm.

Maybe I'll try again but only after a good amount of time at the range if she can demonstrate safe handling and control. I now feel strongly about this in terms of, if you want to give your wife, girlfriend, mother, sister or even a guy who is inexperienced a gun, spend some time with them first and dont just give them a gun and assume that after a 5 minute lesson they will be good to go......which I guess is kind of what I did. I'm certain most people don't need to be told that but, idk. Lesson learned.
For some people, even a stun gun/flashlight is too much gun.
 
I just did an article for our company's page on handling firearms. This is the first bit of it:

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5. If someone else checks a firearm to be sure it is clear (unloaded) and then hands it to you, you should check it once more, they may not be competent.

I like what you are trying to do, but I am not sure using the word competent will help your goal. Terminology matters a lot.

I always check a gun when it is handed to me, even if I just watched someone else check it. More than once, this has earned me an indignant response like "What, you don't think I know how to check a gun?"

I respond "This is not about you. I always check a gun when it is handed to me. I know that to be safe, I need to always follow the same procedure, or I may become inconsistent and make errors. So I just check the gun every time. Besides, checking a gun is so quick, why wouldn't I?"

My response purposely emphasizes a few points. I make it about me, not about the other person. I emphasize consistency as they key point for safety. And I mention that there is no reason to skip steps that are easy. This allows me to set a good example, and to deflect the fact that I sometimes do think the other person is incompetent. I just defuse the complaint, and then set a good example for safety and consistency.

If I want to establish good procedures in an organization, I would emphasize that it has nothing to do with whether the other person is competent. It is more about establishing consistency for yourself.
 
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