Commands for the Civilian Self-Defender

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labnoti

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What are some commands or exclamations appropriate for a civilian self-defender that one could practice and potentially use before or during a lethal-force incident?

I read a study by the Force Science Institute published in 2008 on an analysis of peace officer commands. They categorized commands as "alpha" or "beta" to distinguish specific, feasible commands ("take your hands out of your pockets") versus vague and unfeasible commands ("let me see them"). They further categorized commands as regular, exclusionary (stop, don't, quit), indirect, question, interview, and other. Question and interview commands were distinguished by whether the expected response was an action ("can you step out of the car?") or a verbal response ("have you been drinking?"). They went on to study video to measure compliance, non-compliance and latency with the various sub-types, as well as form a hypothesis about the effect of fear and extreme duress on the type of commands a peace officer is observed to use. The study is published here: https://iletsbeiforumjournal.com/images/Issues/FreeIssues/ILEEF 2008-8.2.pdf

Many of the commands a law enforcement officer is likely to give are not appropriate for civilian self-defenders, and law enforcement officers have the authority to compel compliance with some commands that civilians do not. Page 103 of the publication has a table of numerous specific commands if you are interested in some of those.

An example: I remember some time ago someone posted that they gave the command, "show me your hands." As a civilian, they did not have the authority to compel compliance with that command, and the person they suspected of theft did not comply. At that point, they were frustrated and made a poor choice to fire a warning shot. The suspect's non-compliance did not justify a shot.

I would like to know more commands appropriate for civilians. I also want to evaluate them by the criteria in the study.

I'll start with a couple that I have heard trainers use:

"Stop. Don't come any closer." This is an alpha exclusionary command. I also think it's appropriate for civilians. Even though a person is not necessarily obligated to comply with it, their defiance of it establishes reasonable fear. You might imagine road-rage dude just got out of his car and is storming toward you stuck in traffic. Or maybe a potential mugger just started rushing toward you with his hand in his waistband as you leave the ATM.

"You're scaring me." I'm not sure if this meets alpha or beta criteria, but it's an indirect command or really an exclamation. This doesn't necessarily make it less effective. The trainer who used it believes it helps establish evidence of reasonable fear. They used it while clearing rooms. I imagine it might also be used with a stalker in a parking garage.

What are some other appropriate commands or exclamations? The FSI study wasn't limited to lethal-force situations, but my question for civilians is. I'm interested in potentially appropriate and effective things for a person to say once they've been compelled to draw their firearm or when they're concerned they may imminently have to.
 
These are my thoughts on this topic. I don't know that they mesh particularly well with those who are experts on the subject; but here they are, for whatever they are worth.

If you give a command that includes a threat of action and do not get compliance, or if you give a warning and it is ignored, and you do not (or can not for legal reasons or other reasons) take action as a result of the non-compliance then you have weakened your position. Therefore, I believe that it's important not to give commands that include a threat if you can't/won't follow through on the threat and to not give warnings if you can't/won't take action if the warning is ignored.

I think that if you do give commands, it's best to keep them very short and very clear. The more complicated they are, the more chance for you to get them wrong or for them to be misunderstood.

I also tend to think it's a bad idea to repeat them too much or they become meaningless for both you and the attacker--besides if they are not having any effect then saying them again is wasted effort and a distraction to you at a time when you need to be very focused.

Stop.
Stay Back.
Get Away.

If the attacker becomes compliant, it might be appropriate to begin more involved communication, as opposed to just yelling very simple commands, but it's important to understand that compliance can come to an end and if it does, a civilian defender's options for controlling/detaining a former attacker may be limited from both a practical and legal perspective.
 
There is an old Marine Corps truism that every officer in training learns: never, ever give a command unless you have a reasonable expectation it will be obeyed.

In a threat/force situation, you may not have the expectation that "Stop. Don't come any closer" will be obeyed. Non-compliance may be your threat response trigger for egress, if still possible, or fight if not. I would suggest that such a trigger should include a warning of consequence and that it should only be used once egress is ruled out. This assumes time for escalation, which is only one among many scenarios. In an escalation scenario, something like "You are threatening. Stop." Egress if possible . "Don't come any closer or I will shoot" followed by action if there is non-compliance.

Scenarios where there is time for escalation but not for egress seem slim. In a no-choice scenario, a command and warning of consequence will serve you better in subsequent prosecutorial evaluation: "Stop or I will shoot". But the chance to give any command may not be possible and in a lot of scenarios where egress is not an option, that will be the case.
 
Hmmmm.

I actually had an incident where this came into play a bit.

During a confrontation with a drunk and belligerent neighbor we became involved in a struggle in my driveway and I knocked him down. Right about this time, my wife came within microphone range with her cellphone as she called 911. I could be clearly heard telling this guy to "Stay down, stay down!"

He didnt, of course, got back up and came at me again- at which point I took him down harder and sat on him until the Sheriffs showed up and hauled him off. He suffered bruises and lacerations in the course of events.

Pretty clear cut except that the dispatcher was telling my wife that I couldnt restrain him while waiting for the cavalry and that I had to let him up again. Nuts to that.

The deputies questioned me about this facet of the encounter, but I told them I wasnt going to give this guy another swipe at me once subdued as he had already come at me twice.

In later conversations between my lawyer and the DA, the fact that I could be heard on the tape verbally warning him off was a factor in my not being charged with false restraint/ imprisonment as it showed that I was justified in holding him because he would have continued the attack.

Some food for thought. I am of the opinion that verbal commands may not influence the attacker, but can effect the aftermath.
 
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labnoti said:
What are some commands or exclamations appropriate for a civilian self-defender that one could practice and potentially use before or during a lethal-force incident?

I read a study by the Force Science Institute published in 2008 on an analysis of peace officer commands. They categorized commands as "alpha" or "beta" to distinguish specific, feasible commands ("take your hands out of your pockets") versus vague and unfeasible commands ("let me see them"). They further categorized commands as regular, exclusionary (stop, don't, quit), indirect, question, interview, and other. Question and interview commands were distinguished by whether the expected response was an action ("can you step out of the car?") or a verbal response ("have you been drinking?"). They went on to study video to measure compliance, non-compliance and latency with the various sub-types, as well as form a hypothesis about the effect of fear and extreme duress on the type of commands a peace officer is observed to use. The study is published here: https://iletsbeiforumjournal.com/images/Issues/FreeIssues/ILEEF 2008-8.2.pdf

Many of the commands a law enforcement officer is likely to give are not appropriate for civilian self-defenders, and law enforcement officers have the authority to compel compliance with some commands that civilians do not. Page 103 of the publication has a table of numerous specific commands if you are interested in some of those.

An example: I remember some time ago someone posted that they gave the command, "show me your hands." As a civilian, they did not have the authority to compel compliance with that command, and the person they suspected of theft did not comply. At that point, they were frustrated and made a poor choice to fire a warning shot. The suspect's non-compliance did not justify a shot.

I would like to know more commands appropriate for civilians. I also want to evaluate them by the criteria in the study.

I'll start with a couple that I have heard trainers use:

"Stop. Don't come any closer." This is an alpha exclusionary command. I also think it's appropriate for civilians. Even though a person is not necessarily obligated to comply with it, their defiance of it establishes reasonable fear. You might imagine road-rage dude just got out of his car and is storming toward you stuck in traffic. Or maybe a potential mugger just started rushing toward you with his hand in his waistband as you leave the ATM.

"You're scaring me." I'm not sure if this meets alpha or beta criteria, but it's an indirect command or really an exclamation. This doesn't necessarily make it less effective. The trainer who used it believes it helps establish evidence of reasonable fear. They used it while clearing rooms. I imagine it might also be used with a stalker in a parking garage.

What are some other appropriate commands or exclamations? The FSI study wasn't limited to lethal-force situations, but my question for civilians is. I'm interested in potentially appropriate and effective things for a person to say once they've been compelled to draw their firearm or when they're concerned they may imminently have to.
Click to expand...

Very interesting topic.

Being a retired LEO,and an defensive tactics instructor.

My response might differ from many,I do note that when its time to ACT = talking will slow or stop your ability to do both [ talk & act ] at the same time.

The line from the movie " the Good the Bad & the Ugly " is one I taught.

When its time to shoot,shoot don't talk.

So my answer is that IF you have the time AND ability to "give commands" in total safety ?.

Then your choice is what you have TRAINED IN and feel comfortable doing.

My command is what I used on the job,and while not P.C. by todays standards I believe it conveys the true meaning of my thought and future actions.

My command is " take another step,and I will drop you".

But it would only be used when & if I had the right to use any force.
 
I've used "Whatever you want, I don't have. Move on." That was toward a shuffling miscreant who had not yet made his intention clear, but didn't appear to be intending to spread The Word with me.

I like "Back off!" in cases of an unwanted approach, unless an armed threat has already been made. Then, a return demand, coupled with a return threat, must be made, such as "Back off, or you will be shot."

Anyone threatening with a weapon should be directed to drop it. The weapon should be identified in the command ("Drop the knife/bat/gun!") Identifying the weapon loudly will alert witnesses, if any, as to what is going on, and increase the possibility that these witnesses will corroborate your account later ("yeah, he had a bat!".)

Rather than "you're scaring me", I prefer (but have yet to use) "Don't put me in fear for my safety!"
 
Don't force me to take everything from you.

Having had to brandish a sidearm no less than 7 times in my life and thankfully not having to drop the hammer, I've only used this once. The rest just having a sidearm and specifically them seeing me cock the hammer back was all it took.
Stance is important. At distance being full two hand on gun aimed. Up close gun single hand close body aimed, free arm outstretched as fending off.
Sitting is most difficult especially in a vehicle. Passenger side issue turn the rear view mirror to watch your back. Drivers side issue is most vulnerable to back. Best to drive on.
Best weapon I've ever used to remedy issues, continuous situation awareness. Best weapon their is.
 
This is something I've had a lot of experience with over the course of my "career" and in my experience If you're going to use commands you had better have a plan for when they're not followed. I've seen too many people ignore direct commands from uniformed police officers to think that they're going to listen to me.

One night I was working in a parking garage downtown and I witnessed the police breaking up a fight. I was in charge of the guards so I directed them to position themselves at the perimeter of the scene and direct people around the cops. One young guy walked around the corner of the building and right into me. I directed him around the scene and he just looked at me and started to walk around me. I stepped in front of him and directed him away again. Remember, I had full authority from the owner of the property (the city) and the cops who were making the arrest to issue those directives and it wasn't until one of the cops told the guy if he took one more step he was going to get face planted and arrested that he quit trying to cut through.

Criminals will push your boundaries especially if they're trying to close the distance on you. I was walking my dog one morning when I encountered a Methhead in the parking lot. I knew he was going to approach me as soon as I saw him and he did. He asked me what time it was from about 15 feet away and I told him "Can't help, you dude." As soon as I said it he went ballistic and started screaming at me. He freaked me out enough that I put my hand on my gun and he went off again. He knew I was about to pull out a weapon and he dared me to do it. He backed up while doing so but he he did make the threat.

So first, I would recommend taking a Managing Unknown Contacts class and second be prepared for the whole situation to turn to poop the second you open your mouth.
 
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I'm not giving "commands" in a civilian SD situation.

If anything I'm might let it be known that I dont want any trouble, depending on the particulars.

I feel the old adage of "actions speak louder than words" holds true here, and extricating myself from any potential physical confrontation is priority one. I have no problem walking away with situational awareness and not saying a word.

If that doesn't work then the aggressor will find out the second side of the first part of that adage.
 
I have always just said NO in a clear command voice. It gets the point across. If I see someone looking at me walking my way a clear firm NO works wonders. Idk if they are going to ask for money or pull a knife then say give me your money. It helps I look scary weird. 240 lbs uncombed hair a bushy untrimmed beard and a seriously bad case of rbf. Almost forgot all the visable scars on arms and face helps.
 
Clarity, with no ambiguity. Extreme economy of words. Nothing that you cannot enforce. Avoid escalation and challenge. Nothing that could be later be made to sound combative.
 
This is one of those things that I have a hard time explaining.

Outside of my job I have used "Commands" maybe three times. I know I've said this before but it's been my experience that they just don't work.

Every time that I have used any type of "command" the response I got was "Who in the hell(spelled with a capital F) do you think you are to tell me anything?"

The last time I recall using any kind of commands like that was a guy that I caught trying to dump his trash in our dumpster one night (we have to pay for every time they empty it). I asked him what he was doing and as soon as I did he stepped up on me and I asked him to stop.

I think I said "Don't come any closer please." And he went ballistic and started calling me a punk (or maybe he used another word starting with P U) and again asking me who did I think I was tell him anything. However, he did stop approaching me and he did back up. So I guess in that sense the command worked but the guy was engaging in behaviors that Gavin de Becker talks about in his book The Gift of Fear. And I'm not sure what the technical title for was but his attitude was "I'm a nice guy you're not really going to hurt me or you?" and he tried to put it all back on me like I was the ass for daring to question what he was doing.

There was another instance where my neighbor (Who is currently in prison for robbing a Wells Fargo Bank) had a bunch of squatters living in his apartment. They essentially terrorized everyone in the building but management "couldn't make them leave" (until all the other tenants in that building gave notice that they were going to break their lease and move out at the end of the month on the same day. THEN they could make them leave) I had a run-in with one of the squatters in the hallway one morning and I don't even remember how it started but I told him to stay where you was at until I got into my apartment. I told im not to take another step towards me and he started out with the justifications and "I have a right to be here" a "you don't have a right to tell me that" and "By God I'm going to walk where I want".

Long story short I asked him two or three times to stop and then I turned and faced him, put my hand in my pocket and without raising my voice at all said to him "I'm not going to tell you again." THAT time he stopped dead in his tracks and backed up.

At work there is a completely different dynamic. The first thing I have to overcome at work is the fact that I'm a security guard.

There are a lot of people out there who wouldn't wipe their butt after they pooped if a security guard asked them to do it. I've actually walked up to people and said good morning and the first word out of their mouth was "You're just a goddamn Mall Cop. Don't talk to me."

One thing that I've noticed at work is that if the person I'm talking to is (for lack of a better term) "innocent", that is they're not up to something, they comply immediately. They try to be as helpful as they can.

The people that are up to something the interaction almost always immediately becomes about whether or not I have the authority to ask them to comply with whatever rule I'm asking them to comply with.

Because I work nights and I work in a lot of remote areas if I run into somebody who isn't supposed to be where they're at the first thing that I ask them to do is keep their hands visible. I'm not barky about it. I don't raise my voice. I usually say something like "We don't want any misunderstandings or mistakes here. So I'm going to ask you to do me a favor and keep your hands visible while I'm talking to you."

One of the most obvious tells I've ever seen is if you ask somebody who is carrying a weapon to keep their hands visible they will keep trying to reach for their weapon.

So when I'm at work I keep it very simple. "Sir/Ma'am I'm going to need you to comply with whatever company rule I'm asking you to comply with. If you can't do that I am required to call the police and have you escorted off property and cited for Criminal Trespass. " If they do anything but comply IMMEDIATELY, I pull out my phone and start dialing.

That's almost always the end of it and it's usually the end of it because they don't want the police to show up and run them for warrants.

Having said that, I am extremely cautious when I'm dealing with an unknown person at work. About a year ago a guy that works for the same company I do asked a homeless guy to leave the Denver Center for the Performing Arts and the guy cut his throat and stabbed him to death. When I'm at work, I don't shake hands with you. You don't get within ten feet of me. I don't turn my back on you and no questions asked you keep your hands where I can see them. Although it's not so bad where I'm at now because I'm behind a 9-foot fence.

Anyway that's my experience with using "commands"
 
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skeeterfogger said:
Don't force me to take everything from you.

Having had to brandish a sidearm no less than 7 times in my life and thankfully not having to drop the hammer, I've only used this once. The rest just having a sidearm and specifically them seeing me cock the hammer back was all it took.
Stance is important. At distance being full two hand on gun aimed. Up close gun single hand close body aimed, free arm outstretched as fending off.
Sitting is most difficult especially in a vehicle. Passenger side issue turn the rear view mirror to watch your back. Drivers side issue is most vulnerable to back. Best to drive on.
Best weapon I've ever used to remedy issues, continuous situation awareness. Best weapon their is.
Click to expand...

So what are you doing that's got you in that many encounters?
 
I'm old now. 71, retired from the job in 92. Back then, as stated above, I could say things you can't say today.
The old rule, ask tell, make, still applies.T
I avoid bad stuff as much as possible and have only had one incident in the last thirty years.
I was in a store and in line to check out. The cashier was being threatened by an ex boyfriend. I asked him to stop and move on ' your holding up the line. He said F U.
I told him Move On.
At that point he advanced toward me stating he was going to kick my butt. I made him stop with a strike to his groin with my cane. Police came. Of course he had warrants, and assaulting the elderly is serious offence in Virginia As Red would say, dumbass!
So ask, tell, make, works.
 
1KPerDay said:
That's a head scratcher for sure. Bad actor will probably pause just to think about it.
Click to expand...
That kind of thing can actually work in some emotionally-charged situations.

My first year at university, in the dorm, a verbal altercation developed between a chum of mine a big fella from the other side of the building.

The two were in the final verbal sequencing stages when my friend (only slightly removed from his German origins when excited) pointed a finger and screamed, "EAT F***!!!"

***Stunned Silence***

The guy he yelled at (as well as most in the gathered crowd), looking puzzled rather than angry, said, "Eat f***?" ... ""Eat f***?" ... and slowly dispersed, chuckling and shaking their heads. :)
 
GBExpat said:
Something that I have used on a number of occasions upon squaring-up (after a quick glance around), "STOP! That's close enough. May I help you?"

So far it has worked and I have not had to wade into them. :)
Click to expand...

Similarly, with my off hand in the STOP position, I give them ”That’s close enough. Sorry, I don’t have anything for you today”. It avoids the query, which suggests you want discourse. I begin to back away, then, off hand still extended, strong side protected and partially turned.
 
armedwalleye said:
... It avoids the query, which suggests you want discourse. ...
Click to expand...
I do want discourse. :)

EDIT:
BTW, armedwalleye, I think that we may be in the same place with this, but with me thinking about folks approaching who do not, necessarily, look like Trouble and you thinking about a scenario where they do.
 
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In have used the "STOP! DO NOT APPROACH ME (OR MY VEHICLE)!" at various times when one or more hyenas decided that I was an easy mark while getting gas or transiting some public place. Usually causes them to deflect away while spewing expletives.
 
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