Domestic Dispute Turning Physical. Intervene?

[Rusty Shackleford]

I have a feeling the entire fight was over the car. It was a new, red Pontiac Firebird with rims. What got my attention was the guy forcing her out of the driver's seat. And it ended with him driving off in it. For all I know, she took HIS car and he was taking it back. Who knows. That's why the consensus is to stay out of it.

Taking up for the Atlanta police is a waste of time unless you happen to work for them. On the whole, they are slow to respond, rude, and they treated me and my room mate like criminals when they came to take a report when his motorcycle was stolen. They also either do not know the firearms laws in this state or would rather make up their own rules so the can push legal permit holders around. And from what I can tell, many of them are as corrupt as a Chicago politician. Taking bribes and using the "war on drugs" in general to wreak havoc and make personal gains from it. Not all of them are like this I'm sure, just the ones I've had personal experience with.

 

[jbh13]

I agree with everything you did.
I had a similar situation but it was a girl beating up a guy in the parking lot of a duffy's at 1pm. Didn't call the cops but a few of my buddies ask the girl if she was okay after she, being 5ft tall, slapped, pushed, and punched her 6' 7" boyfriend.

 

[MikeNice]

Stay out of domestic disputes. Call the cops and be a good witness. There is a reason that cops call domestic disputes the most dangerous calls.

As a teenager I jumped in to the middle of a domestic dispute. I got the guy off of the girl and was attempting to subdue him long enough for help to arrive. While I was restraining the guy and waiting for the cops the female attacked me. She actually hit me in the head with a brick.

I was lucky that she didn't do a lot of damage. She only managed to lacerate the scalp. However, it could have quickly turned serious. It could have turned deadly if she had decided to keep swinging.

 

[Rexster]

I have not read all of the posts in this thread.

I wear a badge, and do night-shift big-city police patrol for a living. I have participated in hundreds, if not thousands, of domestic dispute interventions. I have grown to hate this part of my job. I especially recognize the peril of going into such a situation without back-up. The participants in even a very violent disturbance will likely both be fighting me if I intervene. As my oath does not require me to die in order to save someone who does not wish to be saved, if I am off the clock, and out of uniform, I will only intervene if the domestic fight has become extremely violent, to the point of imminent death or major, serious injury.

Even so, I know the victim will likely be very willing to testify how I used excessive force to commit official oppression or aggravated assault by a public servant against her beloved man, in order to take my badge away from me, and send me to jail, for attempting to do a good deed. Assuming a male-female incident, I am going to wait until it is obvious he has thrashed her, before I use force. An obvious exception would be if a deadly weapon came into play. Fortunately, in my region, juries will still generally give a peace officer the benefit of the doubt, but the investigation and publicity, even if no actual charge is filed, can be very draining, and we have union and staff attorneys.

Private citizen? Best to maintain a safe distance, call 911, loudly proclaim that the police have been called, then be ready to duck and run. Some guys get REALLY mad when a Good Samaritan calls 911. Or, call 911, and don't say anything to the participants.

An option short of intervening with force is to hit the altercation with a powerful beam of light, from a safe distance, if the situation is occurring in low light. It is amazing what 100 to 200 lumens, from a well-focused beam, will accomplish. My Surefire LX2 Lumamax is more important to me than a handgun, even when I am on duty. I recently broke up a family altercation involving a knife, with a sudden full application of 200 lumens right into a disturbed man's face. He had no idea I was there, before the light hit him, and he relaxed his grip on the knife. His adult daughters were holding each of his arms, in a mighty struggle, and the light not only disarmed him, but took all the fight out of him. In this case, I knew the people involved, so the successful outcome has a special meaning. I own no stock in Surefire, nor have any financial interest in any Surefire dealer. I am just a satisfied and very grateful customer, who has used everything from 6P and 6Z to the M2 Centurion, M3 Millenium, and various Weaponlights. When I can afford the near-$200 price of a second LX2, I will buy a spare.

 

[MikeNice]

For everybody reading this thread there is a good piece of advice to remember. Check your local laws on what is acceptable.

In North Carolina you can only use the amount of force absolutely necessary. If that level is lethal or deadly you still may be in trouble. If it is found that the person you tried to save provoked or started the confrontation you can be charged with felonius assault or worse.