Dumb Gunstore Questions You've Heard?

[Too Many Choices!?]

September 14, 2004 Oh happy day......

Went to the local guns shop and heard my fav. lady(The owner German I believe) tell me about guys in Europe saying that"You can now buy MG at Walmart in the States" ......Some guy also came in asking could he now buy a "street sweeper" and another wanted an uzi or some other Machine pistol Made me madder than hell about the ignorance and purposefull twisting of the Sheeples trust.....

 

[Archie]

Twisting this just a little...

May I present the following list?

Things I would love to say at work:

1. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of ????.

2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

3. How about never? Is never good for you?

4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.

6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message..

8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

10. Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again...

11. I like you. You remind me of when I was young and stupid.

12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.

14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.

16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.

17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.

19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.

22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.

23. And your crybaby whiny-butt opinion would be...?

24. Do I look like a people person?

25. This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

26. I started out with nothing &still have most of it left.

27. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

28. If I throw a stick, will you leave?

29. Errors have been made. Others will be blamed.

30. Whatever kind of look you were going for, you missed.

31. I'm trying to imagine you with a personality.

32. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

33. Can I trade this job for what's behind door #1?

34. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

35. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

36. Chaos, panic, and disorder - my work here is done.

37. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

38. I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted pay checks

 

[Warren]

From http://www.actsofgord.com/



More Mod Chip Madness!
"Do you sell mod chips?"

"Go ahead, ask me what I sell."

"What do you sell?"

"I sell video games. What a stupid question."

"What does a mod chip cost?"

"Apparently one of us isn't keeping up."

"What do you mean?"

"If I sold you a mod chip, then you would never buy a game from me ever again. And that would be very much in opposition to my being able to run a profitable business."

"I just want one to play copied games."

"What? Do I look like an idiot? What the hell did you think I thought you wanted it for?"

"err…"

"Exactly. Now look, if I were to sell you a mod chip I would lose you as a customer. Now, if I were going to lose you as a customer I'd rather do it on a high note like setting you on fire. At least then I would have some satisfaction of a job well done."

"I'm leaving!"

"But I haven't set you on fire yet!"

 

[P0832177]

I tell you that many times it is the people on the other side of the counter that make shopping difficult.

This is evidenced by a shop in the south metro area of Mpls./St. Paul. The people behind the counter have their perceptions of certain brands of fireams. They really come across as omnipotent. Now, for me a experienced shooter I write of as them trying to impress!

Then we have "C" word of which there are two stores in the state. I was shopping for a scope at the southern "C" store. I had a gift certificate to use so I figured mise as well get something I wanted. The fellow behind the counter was a young fellow. I told him what I wanted! He then questioned me as to why I needed that for? I said it was none of his business! He then went off to tell me that all I needed was X. I walked out the store. Upon return home I went to the C website and emailed them regarding my encounter at the store. By the next morning I had two calls from the manager of the gun dept. of the C store.

He went on to explain that they treat customers with idea they know very little! As this is the type of customer they ecounter the most. Well, I said that I know more then his associate! I knew what I wanted! The manager stated the experienced shooter is the exception and not the rule! So that explained the mentality of the associate. He then told me to personally ask for him or XXX the next time I was in the store for help. I thought that it was pretty good customer service follow up to a concern.

I always get a kick out of people who frequent gun shops. There are those the chime in that they "read this on the internet" or that in the last issue of Guns and Ammo it said this.

Then you have the people that bash brands for no other reason other then they are snobs! I believe what shooters say, not what some arm chair moron with a bunch of safe queens!

 

[whm1974]

Then you have the people that bash brands for no other reason other then they are snobs! I believe what shooters say, not what some arm chair moron with a bunch of safe queens!

Any gun I will own is a gun I will shoot. It maybe only once a year or in a blue moon, but it will be shot.

-Bill

 

[wardog]

I was at a shop and one customer was looking at a stainless Beretta 92, holding it about 2 inches above the counter. When his gaze fell upon a chromed Desert Eagle in .44 he immediately let go of the 92 and sent it loudly clunking to the glass counter. At the same time he's asking to see it he says "Is it loud?"

 

[Titus]

He went on to explain that they treat customers with idea they know very little! As this is the type of customer they ecounter the most. Well, I said that I know more then his associate! I knew what I wanted! The manager stated the experienced shooter is the exception and not the rule! So that explained the mentality of the associate. He then told me to personally ask for him or XXX the next time I was in the store for help. I thought that it was pretty good customer service follow up to a concern.

Was that last line sarcasm?

 

[nomadboi]

While picking up some ammo just yesterday there was a group of three kids (age range probably 19-28) in there asking for hollow points in 9mm. Fair enough, but their total surprise at the price and at only getting 20 in a box tells me they haven't done this before, and then when they start asking about 'yo, you got any foleys' it just got bad... "foleys?" 'Yo, you know, foley auto'.

Sorry dude, if you're complaining about the price of a box of 9mm hollow point, you probably don't have a permit for full-auto, nor could you afford one for a very, very long time. And no, that particular store doesn't carry any.

..and if they did, something tells me they probably wouldn't want to sell to these guys.

 

[Spreadfire Arms]

i had a gold toothed youth ask me at the Belton (TX) Gun Show for a "Stack On Stack." Another asked me for "a gauge with the round thing."

what they meant was:
"Stack on Stack" - a side-by-side shotgun
"a gauge with the round thing" - a Mossberg 500 shotgun modified with the Knoxx Sidewinder Conversion Kit (had a 10 round drum magazine...the "round thing").

 

[UnintendedConsequences]

I have seen manure and stilts on both sides....

I have heard both customers and sales personnel speak manure and also stand on stilts like they were better than the other person. The ones that get me are the ones that sound like they know something until they say a few more words or they do something that has them showing the lack of knowledge.

I saw a Wal-Mart associate (I know...who would have thought) tell a guy buying a rifle scope that if he wanted to shoot a deer he needed X model so he could zoom in on to make the deer bigger. They guy was going to be hunting mostly in timber at shorter ranges where a lower power setting would have been better to use to see more field of view. The guy didn't know enough to think about the logic, and I didn't have the time then to say anything to correct the misinformation.

Last hunting season a guy was in a Wal-Mart wanting to buy .44 Magnum rounds for his hunting rifle. He asks the associate for FMJ rounds because they are inexpensive. She explains that for hunting he can't use FMJ ammo. He looks at her and looks puzzled. Then she explains what a box of the hunting loads cost in .44 Magnum and if he wants any. He bought the cheapest box he could of the hunting rounds, but left muttering about why couldn't he use FMJ rounds.

Then I was visiting a gun shop three hunging seasons ago, before I had my FFL, and was browsing at left hand friendly firearms (I am a southpaw) and the clerk said he didn't have much in stock for lefties, but he first shows me a nice Browning A-Bolt in .300 Win. Mag. but I explain that most of my hunting will be in dense timber with perhaps 80 yards max that I can see clearly enough to identify my target. He hands me a Ruger Deerfield Carbine and explains how he had one and used it for deer hunting the year before. Then he tells me how he shot the deer, hitting it in the shoulder, then firing again and blowing a leg off, then firing again to hit it in a hip, and then finally shooting it in the neck with the last round. He tells me he did this in the span of a few seconds.

It made me wonder about the accuracy of the rifle and the potency of the cartridge, as well as the skills of this clerk trying to sell me this rifle with his "testimonial" of how good it was. I do know now that it just takes a properly aimed shot to do the job, regardless of the caliber, as long as you have sufficient ability to cause quickly fatal injuries on a deer. That year I just went with a 12 gauge slug barrel on my Mossberg.

The ones that make me uneasy are those that talk about doing something unsafe, or look at me like I am a space alien because I am careful when looking at a gun. I have had dealers give me a puzzled look when they give me a gun to look at and I check to make sure the gun is empty, magazine removed (if possible) and I inspect the chamber for a few seconds before closing the action. When a dealer or customer aims a presumed to be unloaded gun at someone while demonstrating it, that makes me want to duck and cover. I have safety rules drilled into me by my CMP highpower club range officers at our competitions and from hunters safety. I get uneasy when safety is being ignored.

 

[Control Group]

When a dealer or customer aims a presumed to be unloaded gun at someone while demonstrating it, that makes me want to duck and cover.

It's even worse when you're that customer...and particularly if you're new to the whole experience of buying/owning guns, so you're hesitant to say anything about it. When I bought my first gun (circa three months ago), I had the clerk take two similar pistols out of the case for me to look at. In the course of pulling them out and putting them down, he never cleared either, and swept me with each at least once. After I had picked one, and while the transaction continued, he persisted in pointing the muzzle straight at me every time he put the gun down.

At this point, I had cleared the gun, but it still made me fairly nervous (call me crazy, but a guy holding a pistol with the action closed and the muzzle trained on my midsection makes me twitchy). More importantly, I came in knowing the four rules in that I could tell them to someone, but not habitually using the four rules such that it was part of how I did things (I'm still working on this). It actually made me wonder if I was overly paranoid about the rules, if people "in the know" treated them as more of a formality than real rules.

(Obviously, my instincts on this were right, and I thank THR for reinforcing them)

 

[whm1974]

In the course of pulling them out and putting them down, he never cleared either, and swept me with each at least once. After I had picked one, and while the transaction continued, he persisted in pointing the muzzle straight at me every time he put the gun down.

If I OWNED a gunshop there will be a board posted with the four rules. And I'll make sure the employees follow them.

-Bill

 

[MikeIsaj]

Just read the whole thread, (I have no life right now). Great stories. They served to re-enforce what a great gun shop I shop at. I can go in and ask any stupid question I have and get a straight faced answer. They make a clear line between facts and their opinion and even went out of their way to help my 12yo find a holster for his air pistol. Being a 12yo, my sons thoughts eventually run to Desert Eagle .50's. At my request both owners gave their honest opinion of guys who come in looking for them. Whacker and strap were the words used.

Wait, this isn't a stupid gunstore story.... never mind.

 

[Too Many Choices!?]

Same gun store as listed in my above post.....

Lady shop owner has guy come in asking for a 44mag desert eagle...After being informed of the rarity of this weapon and price of ammo.....He bought a Glock on the spot! Oddly enough, the guy probably had enough cash on him to buy the D. eagle ! He got some extra glock mags/ammo and I gave him a quick lesson on take down proceedures and that was that

 

[whm1974]

Being a 12yo, my sons thoughts eventually run to Desert Eagle .50's. At my request both owners gave their honest opinion of guys who come in looking for them. Whacker and strap were the words used.

I've always thought that a 357 or 44 mag revolver would be more practicle than an a overpriced auto chambered for revolver ammo. Or for that matter in ammo that is hard to find.

-Bill

 

[The_Antibubba]

"...yo, you got any foleys? You. you know, foley auto?"

LMAO! OK, that one goes next to "you got DA SWITCH?"


Foleys!

 

[uvakat]

It's even worse when you're that customer...and particularly if you're new to the whole experience of buying/owning guns, so you're hesitant to say anything about it. When I bought my first gun (circa three months ago), I had the clerk take two similar pistols out of the case for me to look at. In the course of pulling them out and putting them down, he never cleared either, and swept me with each at least once. After I had picked one, and while the transaction continued, he persisted in pointing the muzzle straight at me every time he put the gun down.

Yeah that happened to be a couple of weeks ago. I'm unusual in that my normal gun shop is about 2.5 hours away. I went with a friend to my local gun shop and I asked to see something in the counter. I was bored when he was trying to put a rifle on consignment. The guy working was on the phone, took the gun out of the case, pointed it at me (mid torso area), and then just set it down on the counter. I swear I was about to draw on him. I mean there is NOTHING like seeing the business end of a pistol pointing at you. Oh well... it just took a couple of years off of my life. Like you, I took out the mag and checked the action. I handed him back the gun with the action open and the mag removed. He looked at me like I'm an annoying little girl who should have made it easy for him to put away... This is why I drive 2.5 hours to go to a gun store that will hand me guns with the actions open and who's advice I trust...

 

[Zach S]

"Stack on Stack" - a side-by-side shotgun

I thought a "stack by stack" would be a side by side.

A "stack on stack" would be an over/under

Oh, silly me, I forgot about the gangsta grip. You're right...

 

[Ivy Mike]

A new gun store recently opened up here and my GF and I went to check it out. The people were friendly and pretty knowledgable about the products they were selling. The prices were pretty good as well.
The owner was working on a customers AR rifle in the "back," but looked up long enough to greet us and point us to another employee who could help us.
At first, she seemed very friendly, but once I asked to see a Glock 19, she flat out told me I didn't want it and that the XD was better. This type of thing always bugs me.
I have the potential to be a paying customer and you telling me what I should and should not buy simply because of what I point at is not a good way to get me to part with my money.
At any rate, she went into a whole detailed explanation of why the Glock was bad and the XD great. I kinda shut her up when I mentioned that the standard issue sidearm for our city's police was a Glock 17. hated to do it, but if I want a Glock, I'll buy a Glock. I don't care if you like em or not. You can share your opinion, but don't expect me to agree with you...especially when I know better.
[/RANT]

My favorite one was at the same shop. Some guy and his female friend were asking to hold every Colt Fotee-Five in tha shop. The guy helping them was squirming all over the place as the customer covered him with the muzzle (finger on trigger no less) multiple times. He aimed it at the ceiling, sweeping everything in his path and then at an imaginary miscreant.
I started getting jumpy about the whole thing. My GF and I thanked the opiniated lady and left.

I think I will end up back there as the service and knowledge was good. Better than some other, better known shops in town. They also quoted me the best FFL x-fer price for my new Steyr S9.

 

[Husker1911]

Clean97GTI "A new gun store recently opened up here and my GF and I went to check it out. The people were friendly and pretty knowledgable about the products they were selling. The prices were pretty good as well.
The owner was working on a customers AR rifle in the "back," but looked up long enough to greet us and point us to another employee who could help us.
At first, she seemed very friendly, but once I asked to see a Glock 19, she flat out told me I didn't want it and that the XD was better. This type of thing always bugs me.
I have the potential to be a paying customer and you telling me what I should and should not buy simply because of what I point at is not a good way to get me to part with my money.
At any rate, she went into a whole detailed explanation of why the Glock was bad and the XD great. I kinda shut her up when I mentioned that the standard issue sidearm for our city's police was a Glock 17. hated to do it, but if I want a Glock, I'll buy a Glock. I don't care if you like em or not. You can share your opinion, but don't expect me to agree with you...especially when I know better.
[/RANT]
===============================================================

A good, fair post. I've made my living full time 15 years selling guns. My personal style is to show you several designs and brands, and tell you the features of all. You make up your own mind. If you don't buy today, you'll remember I answered your questions and didn't pressure you. You might just buy that gun from me, and if not, perhaps your next one.

Again, the intent of this thread was entertainment. I've been selling guns 25 years. I've described some humorous encounters. Those I've described would probably smile at the story.

I'm now going to post a thread encouraging supporting local gun stores. God Bless America. DP.

 

[azrael]

2 quesitons I gotta ask if I ever call Wild West Gun's

1...Whats the weather like up there??

2...Ya'll got any of those fancy carbine's that was in them shooting mag's??

HEHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA


One of my personal favorites is this...and yea it is gunrelated

OHH yea...I hang at a local gunshop to see what is selling well, and to pick up some extra business..NO I am not being a vulture, gunshop dude gets 10% if I sell anything while I am there..so Nah!@!!!

Customer...You the guy that makes leather holster's and stuff??

Me...Yup sure am

Customer...you make stuff out of leather??

me...Yup sure do

Customer...Are they handmade??

me...yup they sure are

Customer...Do you make the leather??

me...nope the cow does, I just use it once they dont need it anymore

ANother customer...a nice lady, but kinda misguided

Lady...you make stuff out of leather?

me...yup sure do

Lady...where do you buy it??

me...from a leather wholesaler

Lady...Where do they get it??

me...from tanneries, that get them from slaughter houses, after they are killed for hamburger

Lady...I think it is wrong to kill an animal just to use it's skin...

Me...So do I...Thats why I only buy leather that is guaranteed to have NOT been killed...The leather I use is aquired from cows that were allowed to die of old age, in a pasture in Texas..

Lady...really??

me..yup


I got more...someday guys remind me to tell ya about the dude who asked if the cow leather was "kosher"...I got into all kinds of trouble with SWMBO with that one

 

[entropy]

Several I remember from being behind the counterNow I spend more time in the smithshop downstairs)

Old (like 80+) duffer: 'Ya got any clips for a tree-oh-six?' (Phone call)

Me: 'Which model of .30-06, sir?'

Old guy: ' A tree-oh-six!'

Me: 'Sir, offhand I can think of about 20 models of .30-06 rilfes that take magazines. Do you know which one yours is, sir?'

Old Guy, yelling:'G** D*** you smart a**, I said a clip for a tree-oh-F****** six!'

CLICK! I hung up.
I figured it was probably an en-bloc for his Garand he brought back from Dubbaya Dubbaya Two , dere, but sorry, no sale.

Quite often guys would come in on Friday evening on their way out of town, after hitting the bar, (there were several within a couple blocks ) and want to buy a deer rifle for the opener Sat. morn.:

Tipsy customer: I'm going deer hunting tomorrow.

Me: Not with any of these guns.

Hilarity usually ensued after with them begging, pleading, attempting bribery, threatening, but usually, "Aw, come on, I just had a beer after work, man...."

And the ever popular; Can I hunt with...?

Customer: 'Can I hunt deer with a machine gun?'

Me: 'Why? Ya got one?'

Customer: 'Can I hunt deer with a silencer? Y'know, so they don't spook after the first shot?'

Me: 'I try to shoot them with the first shot myself. That way they never hear it coming.' (Often with an explanation as to why)


Customer: "What's the best machine gun for deer?"

Me: 'Well, I find the belt-feds tend to scare them away with the noise from the links and all...'

Customer: "Yeah, that makes sense..."

 

[Third_Rail]

While slightly off topic, yes, someone does sell Klingon weapons.

 

[Spreadfire Arms]

Zach S wrote:

"Quote:
"Stack on Stack" - a side-by-side shotgun"


I thought a "stack by stack" would be a side by side.

A "stack on stack" would be an over/under

Oh, silly me, I forgot about the gangsta grip. You're right..."

i think once there was a write up in Guns & Ammo by Mossad Ayoob regarding the "gangsta" grip and if people shot better or worse with it. i think he concluded most people shot much worse with that grip.

thank goodness if the gangsta is shooting at you because he'll probably miss you. however if you are an innocent bystander, maybe you'll eat lead.

i was at the Mesquite (TX - East Dallas) gun show and a young looking gangbanger type wanted to see a pistol grip shotgun i had (yes you have to be 21 to purchase a "pistol grip" shotgun per ATF - or as the gangsters call it a "pistolgrip pump" - yes there is a rap song called that).

it was a beat up Winchester 1200. he took it off the rack with my permission, and instead of playing with it like most people do, he stuck it under his t-shirt to see how concealable it was.

never mind the printing issue of a 12 ga. under your white fruit of the loom t-shirt...but that was quite an interesting way to see if you want to purchase something by how it fits under your shirt.

needless to say....i wasn't about to sell it to him. i suppose it was too large for him anyway because he didn't offer to buy it.

just an interesting story.

 

[Control Group]

I mean there is NOTHING like seeing the business end of a pistol pointing at you.

Motion seconded and carried. The only thing I can think of that would have a higher pucker-factor is someone deliberately holding a gun on you, and that's something I devoutly hope I never have to deal with.

(Though a friend of mine at work tells a great story about a time he and some buddies took a wrong turn while the pres. was in town to speak - he's the only guy I know to have been covered by an MP5)