Fiance not too crazy about shooting handguns

[Technosavant]

This far in and nobody has brought up pax's site?

www.corneredcat.com

Don't push, don't nag. Let it sit. When you have shot handguns, just tell her you had fun, and leave it at that. After some time passes, when you have a birthday coming up and she wonders what you want to do, maybe tell her "I have fun shooting handguns, and I would like to take you and we can both do it."

Just my $0.02.

 

[CodeSlinger]

Hmm... I wonder if she mentally associates handguns specifically with defensive situations, which are inherently much scarier than the hunting she's used to with her rifles?

Personally, I'd recommend finding a local Cowboy Action Shoot. People dress up as cowboys/girls and shoot for speed/style. Of all the forms of shooting competition I've seen, CAS is the lowest-pressure, is the most focused on the "fun" aspect, has the most female participants... And if you reload, you can set her up with .32 or .38 revolvers loaded so light there's virtually no kick whatsoever. Now you've gotten her used to handguns, so stepping up to a defensive option later is that much easier. Heck, if you go with .38 revo's, you can then load up .357s for HD with the same gun.

 

[pax]

So what? As an adult, she is entitled to make her own decisions about how she will (or will not) defend herself, her home, and her family. If her choices bother you too much, you may decide not to share her fate, her home, or her family with her. Otherwise ... they're her choices.

If she's willing to defend herself in general, you may want to consider getting a home defense shotgun, and maybe even signing up for some martial arts classes together. The handgun is only a tool; the real weapon is between your ears.

As for the rest, follow the link in my sig line.

pax

 

[CAnnoneer]

Women are reactive passive-aggressive creatures - the more you try to impose your ideas, the more they stiffen their resistance.

If it is that important to you that she shoots handguns, stop the pressure and instead talk about how much fun it is and how easy it is. Eventually, her curiosity will win over her alleviated fears and she'll try it and likely love it, especially if you are smart enough to start her off on a .22LR when she asks. Conversely, what will turn her off and keep her off is more pressure and introducing her to .44mag as her first handgun experience.

 

[md7]

Decided what to do

As to what pax and several others in this thread have pointed out, using a handgun for protection is a right for the individual to decide for him/herself. i agree with that 100%. i really do. my issue isn't that i want to force anything on her. i just want her to realize that there are dangers in our society, and there is a need to learn to defend herself. now what she does with that is up to her. if it is pepper spray, martial arts, or nothing. i am not going to try to make or convince her to do anything. this hasn't been a serious issue between us and will not be one. it really just ammounts to me being afraid that something bad could happen. i love her, and would never want anything to happen to her. after reading all of your thoughts i think the best thing for me to do is to keep enjoying pistol shooting for myself, and let her decide for herself what action, if any to take. if she ever wants to go try it, i will certainly take her, but that is entirely up to her, and not up to me. thanks to everybody for your input. i appreciate it!

 

[dedguy805]

wife

yes yes yes i too had a reluctant wife. Then i made the mistake of a lifetime. i finally got her to go and then i let it all fall apart. I went trough all saftey info(from the Marines) then showed her proper stance. she stood three feet behind me and a bit to my right and got my first shell down her shirt. needless to say that was the end of it. very nice burn mark. The end.