Helper stole a gun, need advice

What is my correct moral action?

  • Discuss it and give her a chance to return it

    Votes: 71 31.8%

  • Go to the police immediately

    Votes: 151 67.7%

  • Get her university and parents involved

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Pretend you are not on to her, and try to teach some moral compass.

    Votes: 1 0.4%
  • Total voters
    223
  • Poll closed .
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I am looking at this in a manner similar to CSC Saint and have read every post on the thread.

I know this is the High Road and I never like to speak ill of anybody, but the way the OP seems to view the world, this incident, and how he has carried on since the incident is extremely strange or bizarre to me.

What are you doing with relative strangers coming into your home and you don't have your guns secure? You are concerned about the $800 loss, yet you have hired help? And on and on with strange thoughts and attitudes about the girl, giving her a chance, acting like a detective. Practically gives me the chills.

If it is stolen then report it. In the meantime lock up your guns and take a vacation as it might be refreshing.

My apologies if it is inappropriate to state these thoughts of mine and word them in this manner.
 
I did report it as soon as I realized.

What exactly would you do (not knowing all involved) to get it back? Getting it back is most paramount in my mind, believe me.

I am no detective, and I wasn't born yesterday as far as relationships go.

A reasonable, logical person in her position (assuming guilt) would destroy it immediately. I doubt this of her, and suspect insanity as I had mentioned before.
I believe there is still a chance to get it back.
I am doing what I can to make this right and not incur injury to anyone.

There is no chance that I am sleeping well. Nor is there a chance everyone here knows all facts.
 
I very much value people over things. HOWEVER, I've seen first hand how getting away with something spirals into increasingly serious offenses. If she actually did the crime she needs to be held to account for that crime and "hopefully" learn a very valuable lesson early in life.

My opinion is that you are doing her a long term dis-service as a human being for the short term potential impact of one alleged crime.
 
If it was stolen by this girl, then I would say that you may not get it back. Unless you are planning to do something illegal, like conducting your own search of her residence, move on and change the way you store your property.

Why would you have guns lying around in the open giving relative strangers access to them (hiring someone 3 months ago sounds like a stranger to me)?

Someone who steals a gun probably, no definitely, has more sinister intentions in mind. Giving them a break is just like our current legal system. 10 years on average for murder and we let them walk to do it again and again. Stay away from this person if you value your life and freedom.
 
I have read this thread very carefully and I think I kind of understand what may be going on here. I do not know you personally, but from what I can gather and by “reading between the lines” it seems to me that your judgment may just be slightly clouded in this issue. I know that many times I do not think 100% logically when an attractive young woman is involved. I personally have had my generous nature taken advantage of, and I have had conversations along similar lines with some women in my life. It did turn out that even though “they were an honest person” they were lying. Outright theft is different than being taken for a “ride”. I do hope that she is not lying to you and that your pistol finds its way back to you.
 
klover, you suspect insanity in this young woman.
How can you have faith in her honesty or how her insanity can manifest--and as an insane person SHE CAN NOT BE ALLOWED ACCESS TO FIREARMS. You know this.
I can not imagine the mindset that is willing to assume liability for enabling this situation.

Insanity you say. Did you even then consider my question, what if she uses it on herself?
 
You posted this thread with the intention of getting advice I assume? Now that you got the advice, you have a record of your actions that is forever etched into the forum, and thus a document which shows that you knew that this happened and did nothing about it. This alone is not the smartest thing you could, or perhaps should have done.
That being said, I would strongly suggest you contact an attorney for legal advice at this point. Continuing this drama of suggestions is only delaying what you should have done from the beginning, "call the police".
What you have now, is an admission of guilt in the failure to report the theft of a firearm, stop it here before it becomes a bigger issue.
 
A reasonable, logical person in her position (assuming guilt) would destroy it immediately. I doubt this of her, and suspect insanity as I had mentioned before.
Click to expand...
A reasonable logical person in most of our position's would suspect she is not insane at all.

But rather a crack-head on drugs of some kind who stole the gun to sell or trade it to a gang-banger drug dealer, to get more drugs.

For gods sake man, call the cops and report it stolen.

If you don't want to name your fantasy girlfriend maid or whatever she is as a suspect and possibly get the gun back?

I guess that's fine too?
Except you have added another stolen gun to the gang-banger drug-dealer arsenal that will never be recovered until it is used in a crime.

You better prey she doesn't trade your home address to the drug dealer as a good prospect for a home invasion.

rc
 
A reasonable, logical person in her position (assuming guilt) would destroy it immediately. I doubt this of her, and suspect insanity as I had mentioned before.
Click to expand...

You suspect an insane person of taking your weapon, and you are good leaving it at that? My friend, you may think yourself kindly and forgiving. This, however, is incredibly irresponsible. Your naïveté could ultimately prove tragically selfish.
 
O.K. then.

He hasn't called them enough times yet.
And ask to speak to the Police Chief, or District Attorney, or the Mayor, or somebody.

At any rate he has a suspect.
And is or was asking in the OP for opinions on how he should proceed without getting her in trouble.

This still sounds like more wishful thinking over a 20 year old girl then sound reasoning over a stolen gun to me.

rc
 
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Id almost imagine this forum post would actually hold you accountable of something happens as you clearly recognize the situation and are delaying going to proper authorities.

Sent from my Galaxy Nexus
 
Some firearms are due to go up for sale because travel will be hindered by material wealth.
Click to expand...

In the interest of securing your remaining collection, this is the smartest comment of the thread. I am looking forward to seeing them listed ASAP. I have an 1100lb safe with a little room left, bolted to the slab, and not even my children whom I trust with my life have that combination. Neither does my part time help.
 
The only lesson this young woman has learned is that you will give her the benefit of the doubt when she does not deserve it. She has learned that she can play you. I won't be the least bit surprised if the next thread you start is about your entire collection being wiped out while you were too busy or "exhausted" to take care of this problem.

You ask us to trust your judgment, but everything else you have said has called your judgment into question.

And let's shine some light on the excuses you keep coming back to. Without getting too personal, can you give us some idea as to:

1) Why you're so tired and busy that you cannot handle such simple tasks that most people would do without a second thought? Maybe I didn't catch something, but I don't get this at all.

2) What sort of job does this woman do for you? Why did the job require her to have access to things that nobody else had access to?

3) If you and she were the only two with access and nothing else was taken, then how are you not sure that she took the gun? If a criminal broke in, would he not have taken everything of value that he could carry? Surely a random criminal would have carried out something besides a little pocket gun.

4) You say you want to "help" her... yet, if you genuinely are the mentor that you imagine yourself to be, is the ethical role of the mentor to teach her that she can get away with things like this, or to teach her that actions have consequences?

As a teacher, I have had plenty of young people who I wanted to help. Unfortunately, very often that means that I have to be the person who stops cutting them slack, and teaches them the hard lesson of failure. And guess what? In the long run, most of them who fail are better off for it. If you "care" about her as much as you say you do, and you care about her in the right way (as a mentor, not a creepy old man), then I would think you would understand that letting her off the hook in this situation is enabling her poor choices, which is the last thing a troubled young person needs.

I know you are thinking long and hard about all this, and I hope that you make the right choice... but it sure doesn't sound like you want to.

God pray that she was not testing your boundaries with this action. If she was, then your response has definitely increased the likelihood that she will not only take advantage of you again, but will do so in a decidedly escalated fashion.
 
I thought of something else that should scare the crap out of you :)banghead:)

Many people have mentioned the irresponsibility of having a gun stolen and not reporting because "someone" may be victimized with that gun. But think about it...

If she did give your gun to a less-than-savory person (boyfriend, drug buddy, etc.), then who do you think is that guy's prime target? Do you think she hasn't told him what time you go to work and when you get home? Do you think he is afraid of you, now that he knows your weaknesses and has your gun? Does it not scare you to death to know that someone out there not only is armed with your gun, but in all likelihood knows details of your personal life that could help him pull off a major score?

Criminals, like salesmen, often work off of 'leads'. It is entirely possible now that some guy out there now has a 'lead' onto you that includes your address, the layout of your home, possible entry points, an inventory of the valuables you showed off to the girl, your work schedule, your personality and likely response to the crime, and now, of course, he is armed.

This is exactly how people end up hogtied and locked inside their own empty safe.

Please get the police involved, change your locks, and take whatever other steps you can to fix this situation.
 
To the OP. I thought some about this, and I just can't seem to understand how a grown man would have to ask for advice on the internet, for what to me would take one second to decide.

Therefore I'm forced to conclude that there is more to the story than you have shared with us.

Perhaps you should examine your motives in this matter more clearly.
 
I found it.

Like I said, I am on the verge of retiring for a lot of reasons.

Let me ask you all if ever you swapped guns to try at a shooting range with a complete stranger? I have many, many times, and I have seen it happen at our range many, many times.

I went through at least 30 apps before bringing her in. I am not indiscreet about
who enters my home.

We had discussed going shooting, and I wanted to encourage it.

She is old enough to go buy one for herself if she wanted one. I am so very deeply sorry that I put her through the stress of a police interview.

Unlike the 99% of you, I do not have a "normal" job, and my hours are very, very long. Also, it is high risk and high stress (you CAN liken it to a combat zone). You have no idea to make judgements on my condition from such stress.

Yes, I will be cashing in favor of making a better home for myself (and her if she wants it).
 
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