My mosin

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Now that you own a mosin and joined the club take a look at this...


AK vs. AR vs. Mosin-Nagant

AK – It works though you have never cleaned it. Ever.
AR – You have $9 per ounce special non-detergent synthetic Teflon infused oil for cleaning.
Mosin – It was last cleaned in Berlin in 1945.

AK – You are able to hit the broad side of a barn from inside.
AR – You are able to hit the broad side of a barn from 600 meters.
Mosin – You can hit the farm from two counties over.

AK – Cheap mags are fun to buy.
AR – Cheap mags melt.
Mosin – What’s a mag?

AK – Your safety can be heard from 300 meters away.
AR – You can silently flip off the safety with your finger on the trigger.
Mosin – What’s a safety?

AK – Your rifle comes with a cheap nylon sling.
AR – Your rifle has a 9-point stealth tactical suspension system.
Mosin – Your rifle has dog collars.

AK – Your bayonet makes a good wire cutter.
AR – Your bayonet is actually a pretty good steak knife.
Mosin – Your bayonet is longer than your leg.

AK – You can put a .30″ hole through 12″ of oak.
AR – You can put one hole in a paper target at 100 meters with 30 rounds.
Mosin – You can knock down everyone else’s target with the shock wave of your bullet going downrange.

AK – When out of ammo, your rifle will nominally pass as a club.
AR – When out of ammo, your rifle makes a great wiffle bat.
Mosin – When out of ammo, your rifle makes a supreme war club, pike, boat oar, tent pole, or firewood.

AK – Recoil is manageable, even fun.
AR – What’s recoil?
Mosin – Recoil is often used to fix shoulders dislocated by the previous shot.

AK – Your sight adjustment goes to 10, and you’ve never bothered moving it.
AR – Your sight adjustment is incremented in fractions of minute of angle.
Mosin – Your sight adjustment goes to 12 miles, and you’ve actually tried it.

AK – Your rifle can be used by any two-bit nation’s most illiterate conscripts to fight elite forces worldwide.
AR – Your rifle is used by elite forces worldwide to fight two-bit nations’ most illiterate conscripts.
Mosin – Your rifle has fought against itself – and won every time.

AK – Your rifle won some revolutions.
AR – Your rifle drove Saddam out of Kuwait.
Mosin – Your rifle won a pole vault event.

AK – You paid $350.
AR – You paid $900.
Mosin – You paid $59.95.


AK – You buy cheap ammo by the case.
AR – You lovingly reload precision crafted rounds one by one.
Mosin – You dig your ammo out of a farmer’s field in Ukraine and it works just fine.

AK – You can intimidate your foe with the bayonet mounted.
AR – Your foes laugh when you mount your bayonet.
Mosin – You can bayonet your foe on the other side of the river without leaving the comfort of your hole.

AK – Service life, 50 years.
AR – Service life, 40 years.
Mosin – Service life, 100 years, and counting.

AK – It’s easier to buy a new rifle when you want to change cartridge sizes.
AR -You can change cartridge sizes with the push of a couple of pins and a new upper.
Mosin – You believe no real man would dare risk the ridicule of his friends by suggesting there is anything but 7.62x54r.

AK – You can repair your rifle with a big hammer and a swift kick.
AR – You can repair your rifle by taking it to a certified gunsmith, it’s under warranty!
Mosin – If your rifle breaks, you buy a new one.

AK – You consider it a badge of honor when you get your handguards to burst into flames.
AR – You consider it a badge of honor when you shoot a sub-MOA 5 shot group.
Mosin – You consider it a badge of honor when you cycle 5 rounds without the aid of a 2×4.

AK – After a long day the range, you relax by watching Red Dawn.
AR – After a long day at the range, you relax by watching Black Hawk Down.
Mosin – After a long day at the range, you relax by visiting the chiropractor.

AK – After cleaning your rifle you have a strong urge for a stiff shot of vodka.
AR – After cleaning your rifle you have a strong urge for hot dogs and apple pie.
Mosin – After cleaning your rifle you have a strong urge for shishkabob.

AK – You can accessorize you rifle with a new muzzle brake or a nice stock set.
AR – Your rifle’s accessories are eight times more valuable than your rifle.
Mosin -Your rifle’s accessory is a small tin can with a funny lid, but it’s buried under an apartment building somewhere in Budapest.

AK – Your rifle’s finish is varnish and paint.
AR – Your rifle’s finish is Teflon and high-tech polymers.
Mosin – Your rifle’s finish is low-grade shellac, cosmoline, and Olga’s toe nails.

AK – Your wife tolerates your autographed framed picture of Mikhail Kalashnikov.
AR – Your wife tolerates your autographed framed picture of Eugene Stoner.
Mosin – You’re not sure there were cameras to photograph Sergei Mosin.

AK- Late at night you sometimes have to fight the urge to hold your rifle over your head and shout “Wolverines!”
AR- Late at night you sometimes have to fight the urge to clear your house, slicing the pie from room to room.
Mosin – Late at night, you sometimes have to fight the urge to dig a fighting trench in the yard to sleep in.
 
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As many times as I've seen this floating around, I still stop and read the whole thing every time. And I still laugh every time too.
That's because there are a few iterations of it. You don't want to risk missing one.
I always crack up at stabbing your enemy from across the river.
 
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