Politically Correct Weapon-Related Terms

[kcmarine]

Everything has a politically correct label these days. Something to make it seem less offensive or to give it more value than it really deserves. Well, I want to see what you guys can come up with when it comes to PC terms for things related to guns.

I'll start it off with a few:

Sniper: "Cranial Matter Removal and Marksmanship Technician"

Ricochet: "Directionally challenged projectile"

Boresnake: "Erectile dysfunctional cleaning apparatus"

AR-15: "Rodent/Human removal apparatus"

AK-47: "Assault rifle for the religiously challenged"

Stovepipe/ CAR-15 buttstock: "Bill Clinton"

 

[Hoplophile]

Glock: "Polymer-based self-defense option"
JHP: "Dimpled space-filling projectile"
Assault rifle: "Time-conserving sporting goods"

 

[Kind of Blued]

What channels have you guys been watching?

The politically correct term for any gun I thought was "tactical long-range assault high-powered armor-piercing sniper weapon system"?

 

[kcmarine]

Haha... not exactly.

 

[Blackbeard]

I'm not sure where you got your notions of "politically correct". Guns themselves are not politically correct. With that in mind....

Self-defense shooting = "Gun violence"

FMJ ammunition = "Armor piercing cop killer bullets"

JHP ammunition = "Armor piercing cop killer bullets"

Ball ammunition = "Armor piercing cop killer bullets"

Semi-automatic rifle = "Military style assault weapon"

Bolt-action rifle = "High-powered military style sniper rifle"

Semi-automatic handgun = "Mass murder weapon favored by gang members and school shooters."

Revolver = "Dirty Harry style cop killer handgun"

 

[bogie]

boomstick?

 

[Realbigo]

I prefer mine
Handgun -Concealable, short distance medium hole maker
Semiautomatic rifle -Medium distance small hole maker
Shotgun -Short distance BIG hole maker
BoltAction Rifle - long range small hole maker

 

[frankcostanza]

"Saturday Night Special" - Affordable security system for low income families

"Scoped, high-power sniper rifle" - Wildlife Management Tool

 

[LiamAce]

Silencer: "Sound Suppressor."

 

[Halo]

Firearm (n) - gas powered lead projector

 

[Cannonball888]

 

[mikitsubizunizu]

Politically Correct
Handgun - Handheld Survival Insurance Device
Rifle - Long Distance Food Gathering Tool
Flamethrower - Farm Equipment

Though it seems like the media makes it seem like:
Any Firearm - Weapon of Mass Destruction

 

[Mousegun]

Gun = Tool

 

[Kind of Blued]

Blackbeard made me wonder... is there a difference between FMJ and "Ball" ammunition?

 

[Halo]

No they're different terms for the same thing.

 

[FourNineFoxtrot]

Handgun- "Handheld Self-Defense Empowerment Tool"

Pump Shotgun- "Manually Operated Burglar Deterrent Device"

EBR- "Medium Range Sport/Utility Force Amplification Projectile Launcher"

Bolt-Action Rifle- "Long-Distance Capable Precision Chemical Propellant Powered Sporting Aid"


Naturally, these innocuously-named objects are far more appealing than the following:

Stun Gun- "Highly Concealable Electroshock Torture Device"
Tazer- "Ranged Skin-Piercing Weaponized Electrocution Device"
Knife- "Concealable, Stealthy Assassination/Murder Weapon"
Pepper Spray- "Pain-Inducing Chemical Torture Spray"