So there I was....what really happens to tactical "tools" in a fight

[Tom Servo]

These stories are really getting good. This should be put together for a Mall Ninja graphic novel.

Yeah! Written by Frank Miller (in one of his "jolly" moods) and illustrated by Dave Gibbons. I'd buy ten.

Unfortunantly, since I did not have a holster, the gun "went off" and the bullet creased my weaner. But I was prepared for that and bit down on a 9mm casing to take my mind off the pain

Well, if you were a REAL man, that would've been a .45 shell-casing

 

[38SnubFan]

Well, if you were a REAL man, that would've been a .45 shell-casing

OMG STOP! STOP! STOP! MY STOMACH HURTS!!!!

I'm suprised "7-11 man" didn't try to stop the round exiting the Glock 17 with his head. (Crap! Don't tell me he was wearing a riot helmet too!)

-38SnubFan

 

[Barbara]

I could handle it though, half my ass is an implant from war wounds.

That's where I almost lost my coffee.

 

[griz]

Follow up? Did they charge the girl scout with 2nd degree terrorism or did she E&E the search?

 

[Walt Rauch]

You definitly have a future as a gun and knife writer-at the least!!!

thanks for the posts, I needed this today.

 

[orangeninja]

For Part 3 go to http://www.thehighroad.org/showthread.php?p=1435292#post1435292

 

[FPrice]

Alduro...

"...half my ass is an implant from war wounds."

Um, what's the other half, he asked...innocently.

 

[DRZinn]

Lucky my coffee was cold....

 

[mr hanky]

between laughing, wheezing, laughing, shaking, laughing and coughing I am thinking: where does this stuff come from?

That was hilarious, thanks!

 

[Ivy Mike]

swallowing the 9mm shell casing made me spit my cigarette out onto papers in front of me

Funny stuff though.

Figured I'd post a little comedy too. It isn't quite this funny, but it ain't bad.
http://forums.offtopic.com/showthread.php?t=1306144

 

[tlhelmer]

Do you know the mall ninja?

 

[orangeninja]

To those of you who were not offended:


"So There I Was"...will be a 4 or 5 part story.

Part Deux is already out (Mall Security)

Part 3 (Corrections Officer) is also out

Part 4 (Police Rookie) is out sometime Sunday or so

Last installment Part 5 (Verteran Hunter) Sometime next week.

These are the brainchild of myself and another cop who have noticed patterns of speech in bull crapper stories...usually starting with somthing like "so there I was" or "so there they were". I will give you the rest of the story telling formula soon.

We have more fun telling them than you do reading them I assure you. It's good to see our sense of humor isn't alone. Thanks for the reads.

 

[orangeninja]

Final Installment

http://www.thehighroad.org/showthread.php?t=119120

 

[SkyDaver]

These are the brainchild of myself and another cop who have noticed patterns of speech in bull crapper stories...usually starting with somthing like "so there I was" or "so there they were".

Way back when, in the USN, these were called TINS stories ...

This Is No S.....tuff

And you can always tell the difference between a fairy tale and a sea story.

A fairy tale starts "Once upon a time"; a sea story starts "This Is No Stuff"

 

[secamp32]

"My 2 hours of class room instruction kicked in like a well oiled machine"
I'm offended by that. The class was 3 hours!

 

[SAG0282]

At which point I tactically soiled myself

Muhahahahhaaha!

 

[Lennyjoe]

Not bad.

Lawdog still rules but you guys are pretty close.

 

[orangeninja]

Can you post a link to Lawdogs?

 

[P95Carry]

Alduro -- IIRC, I expect if you do a search on TFL - ''Lawdog files'' or something ... you should find them. Can't find a link right now.

 

[MrTuffPaws]

:d :d :d :d :d

 

[crazyXgerman]

lawdog files

alduro - go to this page - http://www.ninehundred.com/~equalccw/ - and scroll down to the green section at the bottom. it contains a collection of links to the lawdog files.