With all the changes going on politically across the country, I figure it would be good to take a look at where things are headed. Here's a news article from a date not very far in the future...
WMD Arsenal, militant youth training camp discovered at extremist compound
Saturday, May 9, 2009
The quiet town of Elmville, Kentucky received a shock on Saturday evening: there have been extremists working unnoticed in the town of 23,000, even training children to be hateful militants.
Following a call to the Horton County Sheriff’s office concerning “strange behavior” at the Clark compound on E. 43rd Street, deputies arrived at the scene and were “flabbergasted” by what they found.
“Man, it was, like, unreal,” recounted Deputy Howe Tugecha. “I mean, we were expecting to find extremists, having gotten the call about the kid singing the song and everything, but we sure weren’t expecting this.”
Added Tugecha: “Come on, do you really need a box and a half of ammo for a .380? Just insane.”
Horton County deputies, along with federal agents representing the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, and Firearms--who were immediately called to assist after the deputies arrived--uncovered a cache of weapons, ammunition, militant utility devices, and even a child apparently training to become a future militant, at Mike Clark’s compound.
“Along with the Bersa (a large-caliber .380 high-capacity assault handgun), we found a 12-gauge shotgun (a military-style Mossberg WMD known as the “Ulti-Mag Tactical Turkey"), and about thirty rounds for each weapon. We also found a military edged weapon manufactured in Switzerland. Obviously, we knew right away that we were dealing with militants of the extremist sort, as no normal civilians would be storing this kind of doomsday arsenal,” said Special Agent in Charge Jack Butedthuge.
Investigations are ongoing as to whether Clark was holding the other two people present--his wife Karen and son Joshua--hostage on the premises. Though he was not currently armed at the time law enforcement personnel arrived, he kept the arsenal within easy reach, and could have intimidated the others into remaining at the crime scene with him, authorities confirmed.
“Believe me, we hear an awful lot of ‘locked gun safe’ stories, but the truth is, they can have those things out and loaded with the trigger locks off in less than five minutes,” Butedthuge warned.
Joshua Clark, only ten years old, was also found to have been in possession of a realistic-looking water pistol, and was recklessly brandishing it about the compound.
“When that little (Clark’s son) came around the corner waving the Squirtmaster, I had to admit it blew our minds. Of course we sent him to counseling immediately afterwards--if he gets a healthy dose of Ritalin in time, it may just cure the testosterone imbalance he clearly has,” reported Butedthuge. “This poor uh, child--being subjected to lookalike gun handling in such an unsafe environment has to have been devastating to his young mind. Who knows how he could have ended up had we not gotten there in time--the bas--er, boy could be dead, or worse, like one of those Richards (boys) we found reading the US Constitution (a subversive document on the government Terror Watch List) in their teens. You can imagine how twisted those ones were.”
Karen Clark was taken to the New World Mental Care Facility. She had been so traumatized by the experience that she was constantly screaming obscenities at the law enforcement officers. It is believed that she was rescued in time, although lack of gratitude for agents’ intervention in such cases is a common indicator of more serious emotional strain.
Neighbor Barbara Bashiepe made what turned out to be the possibly life-saving call to the Sheriff’s office, after hearing Joshua Clark chanting a cultish dirge about a “fair lady” and the London Bridge falling down—a well-known call-to-arms for anti-Western terrorists. “I knew they were odd over there,” she recalled of the incident. “But when Billy and I heard that (boy) making all that racket, it was definitely time to call 911. Good thing we did, too—I hope they put that crazy (Clark) away for good!”
“And that (boy) needs some sensitivity classes pronto,” she added. “Maybe even a timeout!” Following her extreme statement, Mrs. Bashiepe was escorted to the New World Mental Care Facility for a full psychiatric evaluation.
For unknown reasons, a second neighbor had a different opinion. “For crying out loud, they’re just a normal family! What is wrong with you people? What is the big deal about having a couple guns in the house for protection?” asked a deranged neighbor from across the street, Mike Odwai. He was unavailable for further comment, as authorities took him into custody for questioning regarding the arsenal, and any possible connection he may have had to the extremist group. Pending the outcome of the investigation, he may be released from police custody as early as 2024, though police watchdog organizations like Democrats for the New Social Way are calling for automatic life imprisonment with no chance for parole.
Investigations of the other 15 potential compounds on the block are also ongoing. “You never can tell sometimes, but let’s hope we find everyone responsible for compiling this cache of weapons of mass destruction and bring them to justice,” said Tugecha.
May 9 just seemed so good, being on a weekend and close to three years from now--I sure hope Hitlery doesn't win the election (and don't think she will), but if so, we're in trouble.
