An Outfiited hunt
While we can't say that we've ever hired the services of an outfitter or guide ourselves, we do have to admit to being acquainted with a few, but not well.
We do wish to pass along the recent experience (to the best of our recollection of an acquaintance who recently returned from "the Colorado Territory" (as our
acquaintance put it) a Mr. John Smith, a learned fellow, Professor of Anthropology at a prominent Ivy League university.
According to Mr. Smith, he flew in to Colorado with high expectations, rented a 4 wheel drive rig and headed out to the 4 corners area to meet up with the outfitter that he had "retained" for the 7 day hunt. Upon arriving at the
base camp, our Mr. Smith observed the camp appeared to be "deserted", with the exception of an old yellow "tom cat".
Eventually, late in the afternoon, one individual did turn up, who was
"quite a character" as our Mr. Smith put it. The individual in question was dressed in a camoflage "speedo", according to Mr. Smith, and was clutching an atlatl in his left hand, and a short -barreled spear with a reasonable facsimile of a "clovis point" on the end. Unfortunately for Mr. Smith, the aforementioned individual was unable to speak a word of English or any other known language, which Mr. Smith found to be quite unusual, as he assured us he was familiar with "quite a few".
Our Mr. Smith, using his vast knowledge of ancient written languages, (mainly Sanskrit, Cuneiform, and "Hyeroglyphic chicken tracks") was eventually able to communicate "somewhat" with "the character" by passing notes back and forth. Thus Mr. Smith learned that the character was to be his guide for the 7 day hunt and that the oufitter had traveled to a distant town to pick up a few cases of "dish soap", as our character put it, and wasn't expected back for a few days.
To make a long story short, the communication problem with Mr. Smith's guide persisted throughout the 7 day hunt which was unsuccessful in every sense of the word, our Mr. Smith reported. Mr. Smith assured us there were no hard feelings and decided to chalk it up as a learning experience. He did
express an inkling of possibly joining the "do it youselfers" at some future date. We would offer up a quote from our Mr. Smith upon returning, as we recall. " What can one expect from retaining a hunt with inhabitants of the twilight zone." OYE