Howdy Again
First off, let's address your statement about the steel in this old revolver. The frame and cylinder of that revolver are most likely iron, not steel.
Starting in 1873, Colt was using high grade malleable iron for cylinders and frames. Not steel.
Sometime in mid 1883, at approximately Serial Number 96,000, Colt began using transitional low/medium carbon steel for cylinders and frames. I say approx SN 96,000 because nobody is really sure exactly when the changeover was made. That material was used up to approximately SN 180,000, in mid 1898. After SN 180,000 Colt was using medium carbon steel. Towards the end of this time Colt began using better heat treatment for cylinders. But it was not until 1900 that Colt felt confident enough in their materials to factory warranty the Single Action Army for Smokeless Powder.
So, depending on where your SN falls, the frame and cylinder are either made from malleable iron, or low/medium carbon steel.
For that reason, if it were my gun, I would shy away from the 285 grain bullet you are talking about. Stick with 250 grains. Or even the 200 grain bullet. If the bullet is only .002 undersized of the rifling that is not a big deal. You can slug the bore with one of those bullets and you should still see some nice strong rifling marks cut onto the bullet. Plus, if you use a soft alloy, either pure lead or just a small amount of tin added, the bullet may swell up in the bore to fill up the rifling anyway. Just so you know, if you cast from pure lead, your bullets will shrink more on cooling than if you add a small amount of tin. Back when I was casting my own bullets I usually added 4 - 6 ounces of tin per 10 pounds of lead when casting for 45 Colt, so my bullets did not shrink too much as they cooled.
I dunno where you heard that compressing the powder too much will change the granulation. I have been loading ammunition with Black Powder for a long time and never heard that. What actually happens when you compress the powder is the top layer, maybe 1/16" or so gets compressed into a crust. The rest of the powder does not get compressed at all. I have picked out plenty of charges over the years to notice this. The granulation does not change at all. The compression does not extend through the entire powder charge because of the shape of the grains. The top most stuff mashes against itself, the stuff underneath does not get compressed at all. If one were to try to stuff 40 grains of powder into a modern case, the top crust of compressed powder would just get thicker.
Regarding reducing the powder charge, The Army actually reduced the charge to 30 grains, to reduce felt recoil from the old 40 grain commercial load. This box of ammo was made in 1874, and you can see the cartridges only have 30 grains of powder in them. The extra space inside the cartridges was taken up with cardboard wadding.
No, these are not rimfire rounds, these copper cased rounds use the old Benet inside priming, so they look like rimfires on the outside. The creases near the base of the cartridge held an anvil plate in place against the base of the cartridge. The firing pin compressed the priming material between the back of the case and the anvil plate to fire the round. A modern round is all the way on the right.
If you want to shoot reduced loads, rather than messing about with wads trying to get the right thickness of wads and the right amount of compression, you might try using filler. Many Black Powder shooters use filler to reduce the recoil of Black Powder rounds. Most common is CAS is Grits, but I used to use Corn Meal. First I poured in the powder, then the cornmeal. I measured each of them out with a Lee dipper, using a very tiny dipper for the corn meal. It has been quite a while, but I believe I was using about 30 grains of powder. A small amount of corn meal was added so that when the bullet was seated it actually compressed the corn meal, not the powder. This worked fine, but it was a pain adding both powder and filler, so I eventually got rid of the filler and went back to filling the case with powder. But I am shooting 2nd Gen Colts made in the 1960s and 1970s. If you want to try reduced loads in that old girl, you might want to try that. 25 or 30 grains should be fine. Or see if you can find some 45 Schofield brass. 45 Schofield is shorter than 45 Colt so it holds less powder. I buy mine from Starline. I do not know if you can find any where you live.
Left to right in this photo are a modern 45 Colt, a Benet primed 45 Colt, a Benet primed 45 Schofield, and a modern 45 Schofield.
You are a little bit confused about Curio and Relic vs Antiques. Here in the US, any firearm made before 1899 is an antique. A Curio and Relic has to be at least 50 years old and it must be in the original configuration it was in when it left the factory. Interesting about that SN cutoff of 190,000. The SN range of the SAA for 1899 was 182,001 to 192,000.