Dating, Firearms and Reality

[sharkhunter2018]

Been dating a girl for a little over a month. Pro gun. The family business is guns, including importing. Hunts, rolls her own, as well as competition here and there.

She was extremely pissed because she didn't get to hunt this year.

Keeper? I think so.

 

[si vis pacem]

I am blessed to have a wife who not only understands firearms, but is also an enthusiast herself. And I also have the honor of being able to admit that she has been known to outshoot me with a handgun!

A lot of women don't feel comfortable about guns solely because they weren't exposed to them or never had the opportunity to go to the range. Except for a few cases, people uncomfortable around firearms just need a positive experience with them. When I was a child, I thought shooting my father's .44 magnum was horrifying. Not the case any more.

 

[Pilot]

I think that most people who are anti-gun have that viewpoint out of fear or ignorance, but once you clear that fog from their eyes they can make a better decision by seeing both sides of the story.

I hope you are right, but mostly the anti-gun viewpoint is from pure emotion and liberal brainwashing. It is a difficult thing to argue against as there is no logic, so facts do not matter. To the antis, guns are just bad, for no other reason than they just are.

Don't bet on trying to convince anyone or you may be sadly dissapointed. Good luck though.

 

[KBintheSLC]

I have dated anti's before I got married... the relationships failed for reasons other than our differing stance on guns. I call it "all's well that ends well".

My wife used to be neutral... never fired a gun before I met her, but she didn't hate the idea of private gun ownership either. Now she is very much a pro-gun rights gal. The longer she carries, the more she realizes the benefits of being protected... especially at a whopping 5'2" and 105lbs.

 

[U.S.SFC_RET]

Warning!! if you date a woman who is anti-gun she will be anti-gun long after the initial love affair has worn off.
Take it from me. When time for separation came the first thing I did was clear out all Iron from the house. All of it and it pissed her off. why? Because she lost control of me. She wanted control of me through those guns. Not so says I.

 

[ChemicalArts]

Go with reality. Obviously, someone who will never allow guns in the home wouldn't be a good fit for someone who likes to keep and bear arms.
I grew up in an anti-gun home (single mother who was opposed to having even a BB gun around). By default, as I became an adult I was anti-gun, but it was a taught value not one based on experience, facts, or core beliefs. As I have gotten older, I've come to understand the 2nd Amendment better, and strongly believe in the right of people to defend themselves.

When it comes to dating someone, I think you should look at your core values--those things that you feel strongest about--and not focus on the things that are not part of that core. You don't neccesarily need to agree on every belief, just respect each other's beliefs. If you found someone who may not like guns, but thinks it's okay to own them (like my dear wife), then you probably will be able to build a relationship on your shared values.
When it comes to core values, I believe there are 4 legs that a lasting relationship stands on:
Religion
Family
Finances
Intimacy

At any given point in a relationship, one or more of those things will be strained. If one part of the relationship is strained--for example, finances suffer because of a layoff, etc.--then the other three legs of the relationship keep everything in balance.

Certainly, owning guns can affect these values (especially the finances these days), but as long as you can agree that it's okay for you to own guns even if she doesn't like them, then it shouldn't be a problem. Just check the core values before you go to the next stage in a relationship.

 

[statelineblues]

All of them ended up being gun owners after dating me.

coloradokevin, I think you might want to rephrase that...

 

[Bezoar]

trying to get a woman to NOT hate your guns is like trying to train a woman into not wanting 80,000 dollar weddings and 13,000 dollar engagement rings with a 20,000 dollar wedding ring.
Its easier to make pigs fly, and its easier to get child molesters to behave then it is to get a woman to change her views on guns and gun ownership.

Ive tried in the past and its just not worth even thinking about.

 

[ls0n3]

they dont need to be pro gun or anti gun... just pro me and whatever I like or want. Everything else will work itself out fine.

Been in too many relationships where I stumbled over myself trying to please them and concerned about their wants and needs.

Got a good girl now. She isnt really one way or another, she just accepts me and tolerates whatever it is im into. Couldnt expect more. Just hope it lasts.

 

[FoMoGo]

My first wife would touch them... and didnt like that I had them... but wouldnt say anything.
My second wife was neutral on them.
My current wife...
Well... she asks when we are going to the range and to head out gun shopping.
THIS one is a keeper.


Jim

 

[Enemy_in_the_camp]

Julius Ceasar act V scene I

BRUTUS: O, that a man might know
The end of this day's business ere it come!
But it sufficeth that the day will end,
And then the end is known.

 

[Jvandenhaus]

Let's see,
About 5 years ago I started dating this girl who was even more liberal than I am. She wasn't anti in the sense of being a grabber, but she sure wasn't pro. At best she was hostile neutral.

Now, I'm not one to let a hobby come between me and true love, so the approach I developed, (and has worked well on other issues since then) is the "way of no way". I did...nothing. I didn't change my buying, or using habits. I also didn't talk to her about it, unless she brought it up. When she did ask about a gun or a gun related issue, I answered her politely without lecturing or rhetoric.
After about a year of this, she came to me and suggested I take her out to learn how to operate a firearm safely. I merely replied , "fine" while doing the happy Snoopy dance inside. I bought a .22 Pistol for her to try out. We went, she shot, she has since adopted my SKS and my S&W M59 as her own. She still isn't a "shooter" like most of us are, but she's totally in the camp when any of our friends suggest something anti.

Naturally I married her. When we bought our first house and discovered the hidden closet in it her first words were, "Wow, that would make an awesome gun room".

The moral of the story here is, don't try and convince an anti, that just makes them dig their heels in. Just be the resource that allows them to convince themselves.

Good Luck.

 

[LeonCarr]

My wife and I had our second date at the range. The only thing missing from our relationship is a 10,000 acre ranch in South Texas .

Just my .02,
LeonCarr

 

[Nooblet]

I'm slowly converting my roommate's gf, who was a rabid anti...

I just started asking her questions once in a while...

I told her about a woman in Tenessee or something that was raped in her own house, she went out and got a shotgun, the rapist came back, goodbye rapist.... should that woman not have had a weapon???

I'd just bring up logical points like that... point out the fact that she'd stand NO chance against a 250 lb man... made the issue relevant to herself, didn't argue about it... went about it sanely and slowly... she's beginning to change her views...

 

[alaskanativeson]

All of them ended up being gun owners after dating me.

coloradokevin, I think you might want to rephrase that...

Now THAT'S funny right there, I don't care who you are, that's funny right there...

 

[John828]

I ain't reading any responses until I post. I just recently jumped back in the dating scene. Took a girl out, a real sweet girl, and slowly got to know her position on guns. On the first date, she basically came out with the fact that she has no problem with other people having guns, but not for her. (She has a protection trained Boxer for her defense, I recommended a pistol. She only weighs about 90-95 lbs., so I am thinking a little .380 or even a cute little Kahr 9mm.) Anyway, on the second date, I chose an outdoors theme and took her to feed some horses and watch a sunset from a scenic Nat'l Forest drive with dinner following. I mentioned plinking while in the forest and showed her some plinking spots. No comments.

I really want to find out where she stands on the 2A issue.

I have just let sleeping dogs lie for now. I am thinking about taking her to the range, but the weather is awful, and I think she deserves a "girly" date after the past two dates.

I wish we had a forum titled, "Poor man's Dating Ideas"

 

[Enemy_in_the_camp]

Questionable quote quelled

 

[John828]

Well, thanks for quoting it since I cannot change your quote!!! Tell you what, I will edit mine, if you'll edit yours.

I really did not mean it like that. I meant that I would really like to find out where she stands on the 2A issue.

 

[MachIVshooter]

Simple solution:

Don't date. My life is much simpler since I've sworn off women. Until this past year, I'd been in steady relationships for the 13 years (half my life), with never more than a few weeks between. The breathing room is nice.

 

[John828]

MachIV,

Take it from me since I am almost ten years your elder. You can only go so long shooting your gun by yourself. I swore them off too after a nasty break up. I withstood the urge for five years, but, sooner or later, you'll need a shooting partner. Range trips with a bud just ain't the same. Womenfolk just have a knack for some things. Take accessorizing as an example. You'll be thankful when she says, "Honey, honestly!!! You're not going to carry that SS S&W while wearing that gold watch are you? At least put on a stainless steel watch." etc., etc.

Seriously, swear them off if you want, but we all come to our senses sooner or later. I was rather later.

 

[Macmac]

I am a pre 1840 Buck Skinner sort of guy who like shooting flintlocks..

Anti's come to voo for show and tell.

over the years I found they don't know you can cook on a camp fire, that rabbits can be butchered for meat and the hide, that milks 'just' doesn't come from plastic jugs, that Tomatoes and canned tomatoe paste is more or less from the same plant.

Another time i can only assume this women was an anti. My sin was telling her roast beef came from cows, which was a really big problem for her, since she was slopping the stuff over the counter to ME!

What started it, was I had on Gaunletted mittens I made of elk, and trimed in beaver like old military but much nicer with bead work too.

i couldn't help but point out her boots, and belt were real leather, her sweater was real wool, and that her perfume in part came from a gland off a deer!

I would advise you to stay away from these sorts of women. They think bambi is real.

 

[Caeser2001]

i could not be with anyone who truly believed that guns were evil.

I'm a realist. Anti-gun people are out of touch with reality.

that about sums it up.

I've never met someone who could logically and rationally explain why they were against guns.

I've met only one, my dad, "I've seen what they do in Vietnam" and we left it at that. I thought he was an anti from that point on until my stepmom brought up the gun ban issue not too long ago, he replied banning guns isn't that answer and that was the end of that discussion

 

[John828]

Which perfume is that exactly, macmac? Eau d' estrus? I do know that many mascara products contain deer urine, aka urea, but was unaware of the perfume angle.

I don't tend to date women from Arby's though.


Have a sneaking feeling that there is a thread lock in our future shortly.

 

[Macmac]

John it is a common item is the expensive real perfumes... Urea is in all sorts of things from dressed leathers to fertilizers... Ever smell leather that reminded you of a goat? LOL But no joke...

 

[leadcounsel]

Is she anti gun due to:

1) deep seated world views, bias, and lack of intelligent thought

or

2) just never considered the facts, but rational and could easily be swayed. interested enough in the realities of the world and history to be persuaded to learn to shoot. interested in self defense enough and independence enough to take up shooting.

stay far away from #1. god forbid you marry or reproduce with her. you will be miserable.

#2 is a viable possibility.