chickenfried
Member
- Joined
- Feb 17, 2003
- Messages
- 497
My old stand by is I didn't get enough sleep 
Excuses for poor shooting -- best and WORST you've heard?
- Thread starter pax
- Start date
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Me: "Why didn't you shoot that antelope?? It was like 50 yards away!"
Dad: "Out of bullets"
---
Good buddy Dan: "What the heck is wrong with you? That last bowling pin is laughing at you... he's laughing like a gopher on your golf course."
Me: "No ^$#@! idea!" (I had literally shot the front scope mount loose... couldn't figure out out for the life of me why I was missing.) Good thing we weren't repelling zombie hoards.
---
Favorites overheard at range:
"This is how I learned to shoot!" (left eye looking through sights on right handed rifle)
"I wasn't shooting for accuracy anway." (So what WERE you shooting for? Oh yeah it was to see how fast you could empty your 10-22)
"This isn't my gun" (so is it a loaner or did ya steal it?)
"These aren't my re-loads." (they just magically appeared courtesy of the cartridge fairy)
"These targets are set wrong." (even if they were upside down that wouldn't explain the shotgun-like spread of bullets downrange.)
"I wasn't ready" (which happens a lot in trap, even when you ask 'shooter ready?')
----
We ALL have flyers and know when we flinch. Sometimes wind confounds us, sometimes the sun gets in our eyes... it happens.
Most often we don't shoot as much as we'd like and it takes a while to settle down.
Laugh ALL you want.. I can't seem to make post and hole sights work with anything resembling precision compared to shooting buckhorns or scoped rifles. I just don't shoot them as well... irregardless of caliber.
Dad: "Out of bullets"
---
Good buddy Dan: "What the heck is wrong with you? That last bowling pin is laughing at you... he's laughing like a gopher on your golf course."
Me: "No ^$#@! idea!" (I had literally shot the front scope mount loose... couldn't figure out out for the life of me why I was missing.) Good thing we weren't repelling zombie hoards.
---
Favorites overheard at range:
"This is how I learned to shoot!" (left eye looking through sights on right handed rifle)
"I wasn't shooting for accuracy anway." (So what WERE you shooting for? Oh yeah it was to see how fast you could empty your 10-22)
"This isn't my gun" (so is it a loaner or did ya steal it?)
"These aren't my re-loads." (they just magically appeared courtesy of the cartridge fairy)
"These targets are set wrong." (even if they were upside down that wouldn't explain the shotgun-like spread of bullets downrange.)
"I wasn't ready" (which happens a lot in trap, even when you ask 'shooter ready?')
----
We ALL have flyers and know when we flinch. Sometimes wind confounds us, sometimes the sun gets in our eyes... it happens.
Most often we don't shoot as much as we'd like and it takes a while to settle down.
Laugh ALL you want.. I can't seem to make post and hole sights work with anything resembling precision compared to shooting buckhorns or scoped rifles. I just don't shoot them as well... irregardless of caliber.
Finch
Member
"I broke my hand changing the oil on my wife's car."
Nathaniel Firethorn
Member
Swamp gas from a weather balloon was trapped in a thermal pocket and refracted the light from Venus.
- NF
- NF
Axman
Member
"I shoulda brought my 'Big Johnson' rifle (or handgun)!"
ORAG
Member
Dead Ducks
Justin Wilson told a story about a son that went Duck hunting with his dad. He got up early, drove to the blind in the dark and sat there until sunrise. When the father had three ducks landing right in front of the blind he stood up and shot three times. Not a feather fell. The dad said to his son, "Most people live a long life and never see a miracle". The son said, "What do you mean, I didn't see nothing." The fatehr said, "Nothing, didn't you see those dead ducks fly?"
This story lasted about ten minutes on a record and one I'll remember for a long time.
Justin Wilson told a story about a son that went Duck hunting with his dad. He got up early, drove to the blind in the dark and sat there until sunrise. When the father had three ducks landing right in front of the blind he stood up and shot three times. Not a feather fell. The dad said to his son, "Most people live a long life and never see a miracle". The son said, "What do you mean, I didn't see nothing." The fatehr said, "Nothing, didn't you see those dead ducks fly?"
This story lasted about ten minutes on a record and one I'll remember for a long time.
SigfanUSAF
Member
Worst: My buddy Chris, after missin the target @ 25 yards with a G-19:
"I don't like 9mms"
Best: Me after the front sight on my old P220 fell out during firing:
"It really was the sights, I swear!"
"I don't like 9mms"
Best: Me after the front sight on my old P220 fell out during firing:
"It really was the sights, I swear!"
TallPine
Member
Well, I just hate to waste a sheet of paper by only shooting it in the center 
rdbrowning
Member
At a muzzle loader shoot with a bunch of friends from church, one guy couldn't hit much of anything. His story was "I left my gun next to the wood burner to dry out and the barrel must have warped!"
At an informal family shoot in our side yard, my mom was shooting at a soda can suspended by a string from a saw horse. She missed the can. We laughed.
"I wasn't shooting at the can, I was shooting at the string"
We laughed a lot.
She shot. The can fell. The string was cut in half.
We meekly asked if we could set another target for her.
That is the worst and best that I have ever heard.
At an informal family shoot in our side yard, my mom was shooting at a soda can suspended by a string from a saw horse. She missed the can. We laughed.
"I wasn't shooting at the can, I was shooting at the string"
We laughed a lot.
She shot. The can fell. The string was cut in half.
We meekly asked if we could set another target for her.That is the worst and best that I have ever heard.
Nio
Member
I was about 14 and went down with my friend to his grandfather's place where we could shoot on the property. The old man lined up some spent 12ga shells down range and proceeded to pick them off from 50 yards with iron sights. Paul and I took our turns but couldn't hit them. The old man laid them all down again and sent us to stand them back up.
It was my turn again, and I looked down the sights and exclaimed, "I can't even SEE them!"
At which point Paul says, "Well, grandpa is legally blind, and he ain't wearin' his glasses..."
Um...
The best excuse that I ever used was that I was too cold to shoot. Which I was.
Nio
It was my turn again, and I looked down the sights and exclaimed, "I can't even SEE them!"
At which point Paul says, "Well, grandpa is legally blind, and he ain't wearin' his glasses..."
Um...
The best excuse that I ever used was that I was too cold to shoot. Which I was.
Nio
gunsmith
member
I use the coffee excuse myself
I've either had to much or to little.
I've either had to much or to little.
AirForceShooter
Member
The Bestest.
The Barrel is BENT.
AFS
The Barrel is BENT.
AFS
Starter52
Member
"One of my socks is thicker than the other."
Metapotent
Member
Best: "This damn commie piece of trash AK-47 is as inaccurate as hell, I might as well use my slingshot"
Worst: "This AR is so unreliable, I'm used to shooting reliable AK-47s. Everytime before I pull the trigger on this AR, I don't really try to aim because I know its either going to stovepipe/misfire/hangfire or just fall apart in my hands."
Then I proceed to hit every target from 100-300 yds in rapid succession with no jams or misfires.
Then the excuse-spouting AK lover replies "I'm used to the trajectory of the AK, the AR shoots "too-flat".
Worst: "This AR is so unreliable, I'm used to shooting reliable AK-47s. Everytime before I pull the trigger on this AR, I don't really try to aim because I know its either going to stovepipe/misfire/hangfire or just fall apart in my hands."
Then I proceed to hit every target from 100-300 yds in rapid succession with no jams or misfires.
Then the excuse-spouting AK lover replies "I'm used to the trajectory of the AK, the AR shoots "too-flat".
The best...
my friend: "I dont know how you can hit anything with this thing.
me: "what do you mean? You just put the cross hairs on the target, then squeeze the trigger. Don't pu"
HE INTERRUPTS
my friend: "what are crosshairs? I thought that as long as you can see it it the scope you'll hit it."
YEA.....
The worst. A direct quote from my friend's wife after not being able to hit anything with my Beretta 92FS (she was in the army and bragged constantly about being, and I quote, an "expert marksman".
Her: "I don't know why I can't hit anything with these civilian Berettas... It must be because in the army, ours were magnums" ----Whisky Tango Fox-Trot...
my friend: "I dont know how you can hit anything with this thing.
me: "what do you mean? You just put the cross hairs on the target, then squeeze the trigger. Don't pu"
HE INTERRUPTS
my friend: "what are crosshairs? I thought that as long as you can see it it the scope you'll hit it."
YEA.....
The worst. A direct quote from my friend's wife after not being able to hit anything with my Beretta 92FS (she was in the army and bragged constantly about being, and I quote, an "expert marksman".
Her: "I don't know why I can't hit anything with these civilian Berettas... It must be because in the army, ours were magnums" ----Whisky Tango Fox-Trot...
craig
Member
there's a problem with the stock/trigger/user interface.
me explaining having a bad day.
me explaining having a bad day.
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