Stupid kids throwing firecrackers, practical jokes in general. What can you do?

[BigSlick]

Good responses.

The solution depends upon whether, you are trying to stop the activity or get some revenge.

To stop it, sit in your car, parked outside and when the miscreants come by tossing firecrackers, get them on video and follow them home to see where they live. Then call the cops. If they won't do anything, then call your lawyer and sue the little mullets and their parents for mental distress. Surely you can find some bottom feeder or a lawyer that needs to make a child support payment.

To evoke revenge, park up the street from your house and watch for them to do the drive by. When they arrive, again tape the whole thing and follow them discretely. Wait a few hours until you're sure they are all in for the night, then take your humongous Super Soaker filled with brake fluid (DOT3 works best) and do a stealth pass by their driveway.

****** their drive by vehicle with the brake fluid. Go home and forget about it.

Otherwise, you might consider walking out to where they pass, stop the car and ask them to stop that BS (being as cool headed as possible). If they're just kids out having some harmless fun, that will probably do the trick.

If they're social miscreants, clear leather and take them down - every last one of them and then burn their car right where it sits. Then strip down, cover your body with camo paint and hide on the roof of your house.

When LE and FD show up, don your tin foil hat and hold your breath... they won't even know you're there. Then, in your most ninja-esque move of all, fade thru the roof of your house and into the shower to get all the camo off.

When the FD comes to your door, act all suprised.. OOoooohhh those POOR kids ! Offer to say a prayer for them and run crying in anguish as you close the door. Be sure you dead bolt it, one of the LE/FD crew *could* be a part time Mall Ninja (the most lethal kind) and use his Ninja powers to see thru yours and find the truth.

If this happens, it's time to fall back on your training. Stick a D-cell battery inside your body cavity and go into the Mantis. The battery will block all Mall Ninja waves (they use 123's - a D cell is much stronger), and the Mantis will propel you to the true warrior that you have trained to be.

At this point, get your Chi on and go outside and kick some serious ass. This is your neighborhood, and dammit, everyone there will rue the day The D-Cell Ninja was awakened.

Spread your horror oh mighty one, smite thine enemies without delay or remorse.

Then, when everything in your midst is destroyed (except your yard), and all adversaries are dead with their souls bound with tinfoil (so they don't go to heaven), then return here... The High Road.

And let us learn from your ferocity, stealthiness and unmatched D-Cell Ninja Wisdom.

Oh yeah... if the alarm clock goes off in the middle of you fading thru the roof or something.. hit the snooze bar and finish the job oh great one

BigSlick

 

[Hardware]

The first time these dorks come by turn on your front yard sprinklers. I agree that it is annoying, but if the po po aren't going to do a thing about it, what are you going to do?

Personally, if I was going to douse these idiots with a hose it wouldn't be a garden hose it would be a firehose. I'd like to see them take their car back to their mommy or daddy with a interior full of water.

Anything you do is going to escalate the situation. A lot of these kids have a "I don't get paid to lose or walk away" attitude. Doing something to stop their fun is just going to make them want to come back later to get even with the guy that stopped them from having their fun.

 

[Mongo the Mutterer]

Big Slick --

To evoke revenge, park up the street from your house and watch for them to do the drive by. When they arrive, again tape the whole thing and follow them discretely. Wait a few hours until you're sure they are all in for the night, then take your humongous Super Soaker filled with brake fluid (DOT3 works best) and do a stealth pass by their driveway.

****** their drive by vehicle with the brake fluid. Go home and forget about it.

The rest of your post had me laughing so hard I couldn't type. Marvelous. I was going to suggest buying a Ghillie suit for the hose patrol, but your post was toooo excellent.

The brake fluid suggestion has a bit of vicious payback to it. I have filed it with my other devious methods of chilled revenge.

Good on you Slick.

 

[Cacique500]

...bird bombs

 

[TMM]

what does brake fluid do to the car?

now, my ideas:
1)sit in a chair with a shotgun. don't shoot them of course, but they will probably think you will, and they won't mess with you.
2) load the shottie with a light birdshot and fire into the air or into a target, tilted behind you so the shot lands on your property. 12g. BOOM would get them hauling ass, i'd think. don't shoot infront of them, but behind your house so they only hear the shot.
3) stay in the front lawn with a chainsaw and maybe a hockey mask. start and rev the saw if necesary.

sorry if any of these ideas are stupid or illegal. they don't seem so to me, so i hope it's ok.
~TMM

 

[Avenger29]

Brake Fluid removes paint very, very well.

 

[LiquidTension]

Yes, brake fluid is better for super soakers than paint thinner - thinner will eat through parts of the super soaker I imagine.

No guns, pellet or otherwise. Harming the kids is out of the question. Well, if you walk the High Road it is. Annoying them a bit without causing damage would be the best way. The video camera would work wonders, especially if you could get a tag number. That way the police may get involved, at least as much as contacting the owner of the car which is probably the parent of one of the kids.

If you're feeling a bit more malicious, caltrops have been known to materialize in strange places....

 

[jetrecbn]

I remember driving home at night when stupid kids threw a firecracker at my car. I was going about 70mph while they were probably going over 80. My window was rolled down. I was lucky that the firecracker missed the opening. I hope they crash. Stupid stunts like these have killed people. Just like the idiot's that throw rocks from over passes (happened to me), or throw rocks at cars going the opposite way on the freeway. I just shake my head and say ***. Some people just need to be air dropped into the Sand Box.

 

[Cesiumsponge]

The difficult thing about getting evidence or catching these "kids" in the act is that they're out getting their jollies NOT on a fixed schedule. They do it possibly whenever they're drunk or high or feeling especially stupid so its unpredicable. Looks like this is a lose-lose situation that one just has to "put up" with. Myself, and I'm sure many others, don't, or can't spend all their spare time sitting on the lawn being a Lawn Ninja with a ghillie and a fire hose waiting for something that happens once in a while. I'd rather be out shootin'

Police aren't likely to catch them unless they wrap themselves around a tree or it happens with so much frequency that the police would give two hoots about it. I'm sure a lot of them have that attitude where if you try to intervene or stop them, they'll just single you out more often or do something more extreme...unless you can nab them for sure. Cameras sound like a good idea. If anything, overtly mounting phony ones might be enough to them dissuade any mischievious ideas.

 

[joab]

Brake Fluid removes paint very, very well.

Does it stiil? I heard somewhere that the new stuff didn't.

Back in HS there were these guys that put it in their windshield fluid reservoir of the trucksand ran the tube down just in front of their rear bumper.
They could drive real slow by your car a squirt it out onto your paint.

You can also put rubbing alcohol in the reservoir and run a tube into your carb ans shoot blue flames out of your pipes

 

[Mr. Loud Guns]

First of all not all kids are these morons. I admitt there are many of them but not everyone I know acts this irresponsibly. AFTER STATING THAT fill a supersoaker with kerosine tie a match on the front, light it and start spraying. Now that is right to bear arms !

 

[TimboKhan]

My preferred method is to stand on my porch in my underwear and just scream "BEAT IT, YOU DAMN DIRTY APES"... then I sit down, pop open a Coors, and reflect on the awesome power of my drill instructor-like hollerin' voice.

 

[TX_RGR]

A different approach???

I admit I didnt read every post in this thread, but may I just suggest, in case it has not been suggested already, that you just "lay in wait" for the wayward lads, and then surprise them? Not only will they be impressed by your special ops skills, but they may also be a bit surprised, and even scared or embarrassed after being caught. Then politely ask them not to throw that ???? at your house anymore. I was once a JD. If someone busted me, then asked me not to do it anymore, as opposed to being a jerk about it, I would leave him alone (even then). On the flip side, there was a guy who called the cops on us once, for loud music. You don't want to know what happened to him.

 

[MillCreek]

There was a criminal and civil case on this issue in Washington several years ago. I remember since it is part of our state's case law establishing there is no insurance coverage under your homeowners insurance for shooting someone.

Some kids were riding around smashing mailboxes with a baseball bat. A homeowner took exception to this, as perhaps would we all, but then made a fatal error in judgement: he grabbed a .44 caliber revolver, and let off a few rounds at the teenager's car. This was at night, and as bad luck would have it, one of the rounds struck and killed one of the kids in the backseat. He was convicted of manslaughter, and served several years in prison.

The estate of the teenager sued him for civil liability, and he asked his homeowners' insurance to cover him. He argued that he had not intended to hurt anyone, was firing essentially at random, and as such, this should be covered as an accident and not excluded by the 'intentional acts' exclusion found in virtually all homeowners' insurance policies.

The case went up the appellate court ladder here in Washington, and the final court decision was that shooting at someone, even if you did not intend to hurt them, and was unlucky enough to do so, was an intentional act, and as such would not be covered under the homeowners' insurance. Most states have very similar decisions in their case law along with other decisions specifically on self-defense shootings, and this is the basis for my advice that you generally have no insurance coverage under the typical homeowners' or personal umbrella policy for a self-defense shooting, since that too is considered an intentional act.

So from a civil or criminal liability standpoint, I think it is a very bad idea to grab the gun for what is essentially either a minor property crime or harmless prank.

 

[joab]

So from a civil or criminal liability standpoint, I think it is a very bad idea to grab the gun for what is essentially either a minor property crime or harmless prank.

I agree with that.
But as for the homeowners insurance angle.

Where do you think the
"It just went off. I never even touched the trigger and there was no indicator to tell me it was loaded anyway, I think you should sue the gun maker, instead" defense came from

Like a TV cop once said you just got to know the right lies to tell

 

[MillCreek]

When it comes to coverage issues under your homeowners' or personal umbrella policy, there is no doubt that the more 'accidental' the occurrence, the higher the likelihood that there will be coverage. People have tried to argue a shooting as an accidental discharge or a product liability issue, and it is by no means guaranteed that this argument will be successful and you will have coverage, at least under your own insurance.

 

[joab]

I'm sorry MillCreek.
I wasn't trying to dispute you.
I was just joshin,
kinda

 

[Cesiumsponge]

Fireworks and firecrackers are out in almost full force tonight

No people driving by throwing crap thankfully (which was what I complained about), but people lighting stuff off in their front yards like reasonable human beings. Just want to clarify I don't have issues with fun on your own property (even if the city banned it)

Though I think someone is lighting off quarter sticks or something with a helluva lot more punch than M-80's because the entire house shook and the sound was not remotely close to here...plus it set off car alarms and police sirens are going off shortly after.

I just hope they're doing it on their property and not using it to prank because that's some serious boom power.

 

[joab]

Though I think someone is lighting off quarter sticks or something with a helluva lot more punch than M-80's because the entire house shook and the sound was not remotely close to here...plus it set off car alarms and police sirens are going off shortly after.

Sounds like a premature motar explosion. those sirens might not have been police.

I was dissapointed very few homebased displays this year.

 

[Azrael256]

Back when I lived out in the middle of nowhere, Denton County decided to set up their official fireworks shooting area just up the hill about 1/2 a mile from my trailer. They called in a bunch of retailers, a fire truck, and let people just go nuts. It was actually pretty cool. Most displays last about an hour. Mine lasted about three days. We usually had a deputy or a trooper hanging out in front of the trailer to keep things moving smoothly, and to make sure people didn't go shooting off things on our property. They were actually really nice about it, asking if they could set up shop in my front yard before they came in. They kept their cruisers off the septic tank, so I didn't really care.

Here in the 'burbs, it's a different story. I don't really care to be the crazy old man, so I don't go screaming after the kids when they're shooting off stuff. I do, however, go screaming at them when they're shooting off bottle rockets and the like under a tree, or in the general direction of my car. As long as they're careful, I don't really feel like calling the police, who I'm sure are already more than busy, about a couple kids with firecrackers. They finish up artillery practice around 9PM, so it's not really a problem.

 

[Mongo the Mutterer]

Happy Fourth of July!!!

Have to reflect on my best 4th. 1976, sitting on the beach at Marina Del Ray California. Firing rockets at the boats and them firing back. All down the coast.

Priceless.

 

[Marshall]

Well, I don't like it too much when kids do stuff around my property but I try to remember I was a kid once doing stupid stuff for s*its and grins myself.

I would suggest forgetting ideas that include guns at all and just show some patients and restraint. If all I have to do is get out my blower-vac and suck up some exploded paper, so be it. Now if malicious property destruction or personal harm is intended, I would take appropriate steps.

Just keep in mind, you don't want to end up with your car windows broken, pellets or worse shot at your house, flat tires, pets messed with, etc; just because you couldn't deal with loud noises and few firecrackers exploding on your lawn. Don't be the one that provides a reason for kids to escalate things.

Pick your fights wisely, be sure the fight is worth it. Some are, some aren't.

 

[TimboKhan]

First of all, throwing explosives onto CesiumSponge's property is not just kids being kids.

I am not advocating winging Black Cats on your neighbors lawn, and yes, Black Cats are technically "explosives", but for the love of pete, its not like they are throwing down plastique. Its simply a matter of judgement, really. If they are just raising a little hell, and there is no real harm being done, then let them go. I raised more than a little hell with fireworks in my younger years, and none of it was ever intended to be malicious. If they are in fact cooking off M-80's outside your window, thats a little different, and in that case the coppers should be called. But, assuming that its the normal variety of Black Cats and Bottle Rockets, and assuming that its not actually a planned assault on your person and property, I say just keep your eyes open and let them have their fun. Even thought the road to hell is paved with good intentions, they probably aren't intentionally trying to upset you, and I don't see how making a big stink of it will make things any better. Firecrackers go away after a couple of days, police reports on your neighbors little darlin's fester and fester........

Timbo

 

[TimboKhan]

Might I also add that I wasn't necessarily addressing cesiumsponge; he seems to have it under control, and it does seem like maybe someone IS cooking off something more powerful than a black cap, I was just reflecting my own personal philosophy on firecrackers. Additionally, let me also point out that when I was a kid, I actually did have the cops called on me once for firecrackers, and the butt-chewing I got from the cops, the loss of my firecrackers, and the resultant butt-chewing/kicking that I got from my dad (less because of the firecrackers, more because I got brought home by the po-po) were all vast over punishments for my crime. As I recall, I was sticking lady fingers into an ant hill that was on someones elses lawn a few blocks from my house but still within my playing area. Sure, that was dumb of me and now that I am a grown up I sure wouldn't let that slide at my house, but the fact is that I was a 9 year old kid blowing up ants with LADYFINGERS.... Let me assure you that A: had the guy just came out and told me to beat it I would have and that B: I never forgot that he called the cops on me, and I took out considerably more than a pound of flesh from that guy over the years in general mischief, so thats something to consider...