Medusa
Member
What would it take? a H "you suck and we hate you" K MP5SD6 submachinegun with Aimpoint or reflex. So it wouldn't disturb our kids, a 2yo and unborn.
She actually shoots better than me.
She actually shoots better than me.
What did it/will it take for the woman in your life to understand home safety?
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CannibalCrowley
Member
This is what it took:
I went over to her place one day and the door was unlocked. I poked around a bit and found her taking a nap. Since nothing else had worked and lasted; I took her purse, jewelry box, and most of her 4-leaf clover collection and loaded them into her car. Then I remembered that her father had given her a revolver for home defense a long time ago. I found it in her nightstand so I unloaded it and placed it under the covers with her.
I finally woke her up by laying in bed with her and jingling her keys in her ear. She was ticked off at me for what I did; but that only lasted until I pointed out to her that it would have been a lot different if somebody else had done it instead.
I went over to her place one day and the door was unlocked. I poked around a bit and found her taking a nap. Since nothing else had worked and lasted; I took her purse, jewelry box, and most of her 4-leaf clover collection and loaded them into her car. Then I remembered that her father had given her a revolver for home defense a long time ago. I found it in her nightstand so I unloaded it and placed it under the covers with her.
I finally woke her up by laying in bed with her and jingling her keys in her ear. She was ticked off at me for what I did; but that only lasted until I pointed out to her that it would have been a lot different if somebody else had done it instead.
sojournerhome
Member
Texas
Well my wife is a southern girl. When she moved away to the city to live by herself his gift to her was a S&W 44 special. And yes he taught her how to use it. After Katrina it was a no brainer to be more prepared for safety and other concerns.
Have her watch the cop shows. Especially Americas Most Wanted. Watch that a few times and she will see the kind of scum out there and what they will do to others, just because they can.
And pray a lot.
Sojournerhome
Well my wife is a southern girl. When she moved away to the city to live by herself his gift to her was a S&W 44 special. And yes he taught her how to use it. After Katrina it was a no brainer to be more prepared for safety and other concerns.
Have her watch the cop shows. Especially Americas Most Wanted. Watch that a few times and she will see the kind of scum out there and what they will do to others, just because they can.
And pray a lot.
Sojournerhome
mljdeckard
Member
It's not that my wife isn't convinced, far from it. Last month a car dealer 'repod' my minivan when it was supposed to be the neighbor's. After I had the sheriff straighten it out, my wife wanted me to go over weapons and home defense strategy again. (She knows she can't shoot someone for car theft, but it made her realize how vulnerable we are.)
The problem is, that while I devote a great deal of time and concentration to defense, she has to devote the concentration to making sure the kids don't escape or kill each other. It's difficult to formulate good defense strategies when you are pushing a double stroller with additional kids walking alongside. (Your hands are compromised, and if you pull, you are drawing fire to the kids. You can't abandon the kids either.)
We are resigned to the idea that until the kids are at least walking and talking, the gun-handling part is pretty much going to rest upon me, and she will mostly have to depend on the dead bolts and cell phone. Until then, it's too difficult to maintain good weapon security AND keep the kids contained.
The problem is, that while I devote a great deal of time and concentration to defense, she has to devote the concentration to making sure the kids don't escape or kill each other. It's difficult to formulate good defense strategies when you are pushing a double stroller with additional kids walking alongside. (Your hands are compromised, and if you pull, you are drawing fire to the kids. You can't abandon the kids either.)
We are resigned to the idea that until the kids are at least walking and talking, the gun-handling part is pretty much going to rest upon me, and she will mostly have to depend on the dead bolts and cell phone. Until then, it's too difficult to maintain good weapon security AND keep the kids contained.
dhomoney
Member
I asked my wife to read Armed and Female by Paxton Quigley. Before that, my wife thought I was a bit paranoid, after that she has carried almost everyday. Back in Oct. 06 she got herself a concealment purse to better access her S&W 642 if needed. She is also ardent about carrying a speed loader with her at all times as well. I borrowed it once and she was all over me to get it back. 
My wife is a 6' tall lady with an attitude as well, but she is realistic enough to know that if someone comes at her with a knife, gun, or other weapon or there are more then one she needs an equalizer and that his her snubby.
My wife is a 6' tall lady with an attitude as well, but she is realistic enough to know that if someone comes at her with a knife, gun, or other weapon or there are more then one she needs an equalizer and that his her snubby.
dhomoney
Member
Barbara
Your post stated that men are the most common murdered, but rape is almost exclusively against females. So while she may worry a tad less about murder, it is the rapist that she should worry about the most and there are far more rapes than there are murders.
Your post stated that men are the most common murdered, but rape is almost exclusively against females. So while she may worry a tad less about murder, it is the rapist that she should worry about the most and there are far more rapes than there are murders.
PaladinX13
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People (including friends, neighbors, strangers, girlfriends, and wives) don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.
Cheesy but true. For a lot of issues that have been politicized, polarized, or marginalized it's important to remember this principle not turn discussion into about being "right", in my humble opinion. Take the High Road and try to be a statesman and leader by finding common ground and showing how your beliefs furthers those common goals or at least do not infringe on her beliefs.
This- finding common ground and showing that you care- demands listening and actually understanding (if not necessarily agreeing) with their point of view. I think the worst thing you can do is resort to rhetoric because it makes it seem like you're a mindless tool spouting propaganda and that the same ought to work on her.
If you must engage in discussion, make sure it's actually a discussion and not you trying to find another avenue to preach from- people can smell that a mile away- you need to be willing to conceded points (or at least perspectives based on possibly faulty facts). If your mind isn't open, again, they'll know they're being brow beaten and will stonewall you. Who knows, you might come away actually acknowledging you've been wrong about some things... you might not, either, but if the possibility doesn't exist it's not a discussion.
In my life, it's about showing freedom and responsibility to be the most important things and as two things that go hand-in-hand and the women in my life see that I'm both (free and responsible), they happily endorse or willingly accept (or at least tolerate) my actions and beliefs. Going into conversations trying to "win" isn't going to help, but living a life that shows something of universal value is something few women are going to deny.
Cheesy but true. For a lot of issues that have been politicized, polarized, or marginalized it's important to remember this principle not turn discussion into about being "right", in my humble opinion. Take the High Road and try to be a statesman and leader by finding common ground and showing how your beliefs furthers those common goals or at least do not infringe on her beliefs.
This- finding common ground and showing that you care- demands listening and actually understanding (if not necessarily agreeing) with their point of view. I think the worst thing you can do is resort to rhetoric because it makes it seem like you're a mindless tool spouting propaganda and that the same ought to work on her.
If you must engage in discussion, make sure it's actually a discussion and not you trying to find another avenue to preach from- people can smell that a mile away- you need to be willing to conceded points (or at least perspectives based on possibly faulty facts). If your mind isn't open, again, they'll know they're being brow beaten and will stonewall you. Who knows, you might come away actually acknowledging you've been wrong about some things... you might not, either, but if the possibility doesn't exist it's not a discussion.
In my life, it's about showing freedom and responsibility to be the most important things and as two things that go hand-in-hand and the women in my life see that I'm both (free and responsible), they happily endorse or willingly accept (or at least tolerate) my actions and beliefs. Going into conversations trying to "win" isn't going to help, but living a life that shows something of universal value is something few women are going to deny.
Stickjockey
Member
I had help. You see, my Wife's ex husband is/was a cop, and he used to take great delight in regaling her with stories of the lowlifes he'd deal with on any given shift.
thebaldguy
Member
We've seen quite an increase in crimes in our neighborhood and city. That motivates both of us to keep secure.
Well....lol...I am hoping the point got accross, there was a $12,000,000.00 cocaine bust last week less than 3 blocks from our apartment. She still doesnt seem overly concerned....and if a multimillion dollar drug bust doesnt worry her then I just give up.
Winter Borne
Member
Nothing... My wife grew up in Brooklyn, NY and was riding subways alone since she was in the 1st grade. She UNDERSTANDS home security and has some of the best street smarts of any beat cop out there.
mk
mk
IndianaBoy
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Buy her a police scanner. Tune it to the local police bands.
When she hears all the activity... she will figure it out.
When she hears all the activity... she will figure it out.
Powderman
Member
I got lucky.
My wife is very independent, very strong and knows the value of being prepared. She doesn't shoot too much--but knows how to shoot, most definitely!
She has, as a primary firearm to reach for while in bed, a Glock 22, loaded with RA40T.
If she has advance warning, though, all she has to do is to reach under the bed for her primary go-to piece: the Norinco AK, folding stock, and kept loaded (chamber empty) with 28 ea. 7.62x39 hollowpoints.
It has been my experience--especially after meeting her side of the family--that those country girls from WV know how to shoot--and boy, do they have a FIERCE temper!!!
My wife is very independent, very strong and knows the value of being prepared. She doesn't shoot too much--but knows how to shoot, most definitely!
She has, as a primary firearm to reach for while in bed, a Glock 22, loaded with RA40T.
If she has advance warning, though, all she has to do is to reach under the bed for her primary go-to piece: the Norinco AK, folding stock, and kept loaded (chamber empty) with 28 ea. 7.62x39 hollowpoints.
It has been my experience--especially after meeting her side of the family--that those country girls from WV know how to shoot--and boy, do they have a FIERCE temper!!!
Try this.
Sit her down in front of the computer.
Open the web browser. Go to http://www.familywatchdog.us/
Type in your address. Hit "search". A map will appear with all the locations of registered sex offenders in the surrounding area.
Then remind her that these are just the ones who have been caught, and who are registered. Who knows how many have not been caught that are out there also? How many are not where they are registered to be? Then point out that the recidivism rate for sex offenders is very very high.
In our case, there were at least thirty registered sex offenders who had been convicted of rape living within less than half our daily commute distance from our home. And we live in what I consider to be a "good" area on a quiet tree-lined street in the suburbs.
If that doesn't cast the fear for hers and her children's safety into sharp relief in her mind, then you are dealing with a lost cause. If that's the case, nothing short of her own personal experience with harm is going to convince her.
Sit her down in front of the computer.
Open the web browser. Go to http://www.familywatchdog.us/
Type in your address. Hit "search". A map will appear with all the locations of registered sex offenders in the surrounding area.
Then remind her that these are just the ones who have been caught, and who are registered. Who knows how many have not been caught that are out there also? How many are not where they are registered to be? Then point out that the recidivism rate for sex offenders is very very high.
In our case, there were at least thirty registered sex offenders who had been convicted of rape living within less than half our daily commute distance from our home. And we live in what I consider to be a "good" area on a quiet tree-lined street in the suburbs.
If that doesn't cast the fear for hers and her children's safety into sharp relief in her mind, then you are dealing with a lost cause. If that's the case, nothing short of her own personal experience with harm is going to convince her.
GrizzlyGraves
Member
<scratches head> ........
Still working on that one. But I do remember a night spent at her cabin where we overheard some strange "bumps in the night." She was quick to ask whether my sks (only gun owned at the time) was loaded or not. Then she wouldn't go to sleep until I verified this fact to her.
Still working on that one. But I do remember a night spent at her cabin where we overheard some strange "bumps in the night." She was quick to ask whether my sks (only gun owned at the time) was loaded or not. Then she wouldn't go to sleep until I verified this fact to her.
Sean85746
Member
The birth of our daughter is what finally spurred my wife into a more active role in the security of our day to day lives.
Now, she is a Glock armed Momma Grizzer Bear where our daughter is concerned.
When she has to go back to her office in the evening...she has her Glock IWB. And often takes our rottweiler with her...just for some "mommy time with the dog"....lol.
She has become MUCH more aware of her surroundings....basically going about her business in "soft yellow". Always looking, seeing, and carrying herself as a predator rather than victim (she is 6'1 1/2" tall and weighs a healthy 180lbs).
I watched her one day when she didn't know I was watching...we just happened to show up at the same store by coincidence, and I watched her go from our Urban Assault Minivan to the store. She had our 3 year-old daughter's hand in her left hand, while keeping her strong hand free to draw if neccessary. She met every look with confident eye contact.
I was damned proud of her.
Now, she is a Glock armed Momma Grizzer Bear where our daughter is concerned.
When she has to go back to her office in the evening...she has her Glock IWB. And often takes our rottweiler with her...just for some "mommy time with the dog"....lol.
She has become MUCH more aware of her surroundings....basically going about her business in "soft yellow". Always looking, seeing, and carrying herself as a predator rather than victim (she is 6'1 1/2" tall and weighs a healthy 180lbs).
I watched her one day when she didn't know I was watching...we just happened to show up at the same store by coincidence, and I watched her go from our Urban Assault Minivan to the store. She had our 3 year-old daughter's hand in her left hand, while keeping her strong hand free to draw if neccessary. She met every look with confident eye contact.
I was damned proud of her.
TonyB
Member
Mywife has never been anti-home security,but this sealed the deal.There was an escaped con a few mile from our house,that the police were searching for.It was broad daylight,and he wasrunning through people's yards looking for a house to break into.My wife at the time ran a nail business out of our home.She had me come home at lunch,and load up the shotgun,and she kept it behind the curtain next to her.It's still there.She still doesn't carry,but that will come in time I think.She does get mad if I don't carry(not that it happens often)
I guess my wife and daughter understand security even better than I had hoped they would. See this post regarding our experience recently with someone illegally attempting to enter our home:
http://thehighroad.org/showthread.php?t=267482
http://thehighroad.org/showthread.php?t=267482
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