Is this a good way to handle a situation while carrying

[Double Naught Spy]

If you took the gun because you considered it a bad part of town, then maybe you should not have taken your kids. Or, maybe you should have gotten gas in the good part of town so that you didn't have to make any additional stops in the bad part of town that might result in a confrontation that puts your kids at risk.

The beggar turned out to not be a threat and so life goes on just fine, but next time, consider your options more clearly and prepare better.

 

[Flyboy73]

The place i stoped is not the bad part of town in saginaw, but its close by. Hard to find a good part of Saginaw, just broke up a major gang fight at the local mall, which is supposed to be the good part of town.

Brion

 

[GuyWithQuestions]

My Thoughts...Don't let him get close!

My thoughts on the situation is that I think it was good you thought about being prepared with your sidearm. Regardless of whether you're traveling to a dangerous place or not, many self-defense experts that I've heard say in order for a strategy to be useful, it has to always be available. A deadly assault may not necessarily come when you most expect it. You did well by carrying it with you. I've carried mine "almost" every single day since I got my permit, with a round in the chamber, unless if I'm in a situation where I can't legally carry it.

One thing that I wouldn't have done is let a complete stranger that appears to have been loitering to get that close to me. According to Marc MacYoung, assaults often start with predators sizing you up to see if you are "prey" material, and then trying to position you for an easier attack. Some complete stranger coming to you and begging may be trying to size you up, and if you fit his criteria he may attack after he's positioned just right. I've read from several places that a lot of car jackings and armed robberies happen in parking lots (although depending on how many people were there at the time also plays a role). I also personally know people who were assaulted when asked for help as a lure.

What I would have done is first said, "Easy Mr, you're a little too close for my own comfort." If that didn't work, strongly held out a hand and shouted "BACK OFF!" while slowly backing up a little. I was reading something by a person who was a dummy victim of robbers, for the police, that 50% of would be assailants will back off and leave you alone if you're firm and tell them to back off. Also, bystanders are more likely to identify you as the victim who was trying to avoid a fight when they see hands up while backing away. Then if he was still coming closer I would have just popped him with my pepper spray and called the police. I'm not going to take chances with a complete stranger who has no reasonable reason to be within a certain distance of me in situations that say it's not necessary. If that doesn't work and he makes you reasonably believe he has deadly force (a knife in his hand), then pull out the gun.... (and what your state law says to do from there; although if you have to think too much about the state law you may not have enough reasonable belief that your life is in immediate danger, but it's good to read anyway).

 

[Badge3483]

Flyboy 73,

You did exactly the right thing. Even if your boys weren't in the car, you did the right thing. Protecting our families some times mean not doing anything. Even if you didn't have a buck, the guy would have probably gone away. After being a Det cop for almost 15 years and living in the city, you did what I would have done. I too, don't carry money. Maybe it was the way it was supposed to be that day, that you did have a buck. Most beggers, for what ever reason they are begging for, don't want trouble, just money. So don't worry if you are asked again, and don't have the money.
I am so glad that they started "paying at the pump." When my daughter was in her car seat, I used to pull up to the gas station door, car keys in my hand, the car doors locked and pay for my gas,(back in the '80's) Some attendants actually questioned what the heck I was doing and why didn't I just pull to the pumps. Not with my precious cargo and knowing what I knew from being a Detriot street cop. To hell with what people think.

 

[thebaldguy]

When approached, I watch closely and just say "sorry, no". I will walk away if I can if they don't.

 

[wayneinFL]

too close?

Last time I was in Miami (that's where they go when it gets cold) I must have had five or ten of these guys approach me. There were two lined up at the McDonald's drive thru.

Yelling at every one of them to back off just seems a little paranoid. I keep change in there for tolls. If I have a dollar or $.50 to spare I let them have it, if not, I don't.

Backfired on me one time about a year ago. I had a pile of cigarettes under my arm that I'd picked up off the side of the road- a truck dropped a couple cases and kept going. Some bum comes up to me telling me he just got out of jail and had some sob story, about how he got in there, how hungry he was. I'm thinking, what kind of idiot is this? I'm picking up road cigarettes, and he thinks I'm loaded with dough? I had one hand in my gun pocket, I put the other in my change pocket, pulled out a dollar bill and handed it over.

His eyes lit up. God bless you! Aw thanks, man, I haven't eaten since yesterday, man you're the best, man, aw, thank God for people like you!

I looked and saw I'd handed over a ten by mistake. too late to take it back. I figured I'd given him a couple quarts of cheap liquor. Oh well.

I tossed the cigarettes in the van and went across the street to Wendy's. As I was sitting in my van I saw this guy in the parking lot. I thought he was still begging for money until I saw he was hugging a wendy's bag like it was a lost child. Guess he really was hungry.

 

[jeepmor]

When I'm in downtown Portland and approached by beggars, I occasionally give some pocket change. If they ask for more, I tell em no. If anyone else approaches, I say, sorry, gave it away already, saving the rest my beer, not yours.

You did fine, however, carry all the time. You can't plan emergencies. Think of your pistol like a fire extinguisher. You don't buy a fire extinguisher because you plan on having a fire, you have a fire extinguisher, just in case you have a fire. Same analogy for your gun, it's insurance you hope to never use, but when you need it, you'll need it real bad.

 

[Papaster]

Mostly I'd say you did just fine. The only caveat might be that in some places (my locale being one of them) giving any money to beggars is against the law. I agree with what you did in principal, however, in that you appeased the situation on a very low level of interaction, and quickly. I've found myself in similar situations, but like you, don't carry cash but once in a blue moon. I've never found myself in that situation under a blue moon. I really don't want to condone any illegal activity, but I agree whole-heartedly with how you handled yourself. Always be ready, be polite, be professional, and do what you must to protect yourself and your family.

 

[mljdeckard]

I normally do criticize for letting him get so close, but this situation is a little different. You were in a fixed place, you can't abandon your vehicle, or the kids inside.

Sometimes, you have to judge the demeanor, and decide if the best way to avoid a confrontation is to give him what he wants so he will walk away. That is what you did, and you were right.